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Self Destructive Love Conspiracies


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One of the key "problems" of game theory is your opponents intentions.

If you misunderstand their intention, not much will work.

Business, chess players, even athletes understand this intuitively.

Purposely projecting a "false" intention on your enemy is a deeply instinctive trait.

The other day I saw a video of a gazelle faking the crap out of an attacking lion.

The gazelle was drinking at a stream.

And at the last minute saw a lion that had been stalking it.

The gazelle faked one way, got the lion to commit and then went the other way.

Even before the Normandy invasion the allies tried to fake out the Nazis.

They got a real dead guy, put him where the Nazi's would find him, and put some info on him to hopefully trick the Nazi's.

People tend to scoff at conspiracy theories, but conspiring to fake out your enemy is way older than human brains.

The reason zebras have stripes is so when they hang out in groups, they look like on humongous animal.

Venus fly traps have been "conspiring" against poor flies since long before humans showed up.

They say that all's fair in love and war.

Which isn't really a law, more of a recommendation.

The war part is easy to understand.

Lions vs. Zebras, Nazis vs. Allies.

Do whatever you can do win.

But what about love?

Does this mean using trickery to win somebody's affection?

Or does it mean two guys trying to win the heart of one lady at war with each other?

Sure, when creating love in somebody, there are certain strategies that work better than others.

Like if you sort of like somebody, you don't gush with pure truth.

That would scare them away.

On the other hand, it can help to play a little hard to get.

But you go too far, you'll lose them.

Devoid of any "war" strategies, consciously creating love in somebody is much more of a delicate balance.

To let it flourish slowly like a flower.

Just the right amount of water and attention.

After all, flowers have been blooming since the dawn of time.

They don't do so well when being smothered.

But one thing WILL kill any love from flourishing.

And that is MISTAKENLY using war tactics.

Misdirection tactics.

Most people have a false belief of being at least a little "broken" on the inside.

So we respond to attempts of others to get close AS IF we were under attack.

We act like the gazelle thinking it's about to get eaten.

In this case, playing hard to get IS a defensive strategy.

We WANT to keep them at arms length.

It's better than the alternative.

At least the one we imagine.

And that is they'll find out who we REALLY are, and run away.

So we keep them at arms length to keep that from happening.

Even worse is we PRETEND we are using some ninja-love-strategy.

But if you get rid of all this nonsense, false beliefs, false fears, you, and they, will see who you REALLY are.

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