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The Cookie Jar Romance Strategy


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One of the top compelling forces of persuasion is scarcity.

Even when it's blatantly fake, it still works.

The less of something there is, the more we want it.

The less of something there is, the more we value it.

This was famously demonstrated in the cookie jar experiment.

A bunch of people were asked to take a cookie from a jar, eat it, and then fill out a taste questionnaire.

When the cookie jar was nearly full, it had an average level of quality.

When the cookie jar was nearly empty, it had a much HIGHER perceived quality.

From a marketing and advertising standpoint, there are TONS of ways to leverage scarcity.

Scarcity of product.

Scarcity of availability.

Scarcity of information.

As an individual, there are also plenty of ways to leverage scarcity.

To dramatically increase the perceived value of YOU.

Remember, same cookie, nearly empty jar = VERY TASTY.

Same cookie, full jar = AVERAGE TASTY.

Unfortunately, people kind of mess this up.

Especially when romance kicks in.

This is when you call too much, text too much, make yourself too available.

You are making yourself very much like the FULL cookie jar.

On the other hand, when you call or text sporadically, and infrequently, this creates the nearly empty cookie jar effect.


But even within an interpersonal relationship, one that is already established, you can INCREASE or DECREASE your perceived scarcity.

Even if you live with somebody, and you both have work from home jobs, and you are both super agoraphobic (scared to go outside).

How the heck can you INCREASE scarcity when you live with and see somebody 24/7?

By setting boundaries.

Personal boundaries are like nearly empty cookie jars.

No personal boundaries are like overflowing cookie jars.

But this is also a two way street.

By setting boundaries, you are demonstrating value.

By setting and defining boundaries, you are demonstrating that YOU value YOU.

And when YOU value YOU, other people will value YOU.

The MORE you value YOU, the more other people will value you.

Enter the chicken and the egg.

Or the egg and the chicken, whichever you prefer.

Simply by CREATING and DEFINING boundaries, YOU will value YOU more.

The more you create and set personal boundaries, the more people will value you.

Soon, this will become a self-fulfilling cycle.

The more you value you more, the more they value you more, which will make you value you more.

All it takes is a first few steps.

Learn How:


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