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If you happened to be wandering through the jungle and found an angry gorilla charging at you, what would be the best response?

Those who study primates tell us that you break off eye contact, lower your gaze, perhaps look off to the side.

And be as passive as you can.

If the gorilla is really angry, he'll put his nose a few fractions of an inch away from yours, and give you the gorilla stare of death.

(And probably some pretty nasty breath as well...)

Needless to say, this is perhaps the most terrifying thing we can imagine.

Even those who've ventured into the jungle for one reason or another say that when a gorilla screams at the top of his lungs, EVERYBODY shuts the hell up.

It's like when the gorilla is angry, NOBODY wants to be anywhere near him.

Funny thing is gorillas RARELY get physical.

Their main power is INTIMIDATION.

But it works.

It's kind of like a very vicious energy field that automatically creates terror in everybody nearby.

We can see this same trait in us humans as well.

We are primates, after all.

You see two guys getting ready to rumble and they'll try to give each other the gorilla stare.

The best example is two boxers who are getting instructed on the rules, just before the fight starts.

Nobody needs to tell them this.

This is something they don't need to practice.

This death stare is a very ancient instinct.

This is why it is HARD to make eye contact with strangers for most people.

This can work both ways.

You can give powerful stares as well as receive them.

When gorillas, boxers and bar brawlers give each other the death stare, there aren't many thoughts in their brain.

Expect maybe half conscious thoughts of destruction.

But what happens if you fill your mind with actual thoughts?

Not fear based thoughts like, "Please don't kill me!"

But thoughts of playful confidence.

This might not be a good idea if the person you're staring at IS actually contemplating violence.

But this is EXTREMELY rare.

When your brain is filled with plenty of positive ideas, any negative energy in their brain will VANISH.

They'll see it on your face.

They'll read it in your non-verbal energy.

What kind of thoughts are helpful?

Curious thoughts.

About what they're all about.

About what they might say.

About how you might turn WHATEVER they say into a playful conversation.

We can imagine that inside everybody are two ancient primates.

The gorilla side, that is only pure anger.

And the playful monkey side, who wants to have fun.

If you fill your mind with goofy thoughts and a subtle invitation to play, people will be HAPPY to join you.

Especially when you have plenty of built in, playful thought structures at the ready.

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