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If you were walking down the street, and somebody punched you in the face, that would suck.

But you would also plenty of ways to get back.

Most people who saw it would agree that it sucks.

And plenty of times when this happens, people step in.

This is the kind of unwritten rules of a civil society.

You can't walk around punching people.

So when most people see somebody do this, they don't like it.

Even if they didn't step in, if you called the cops, plenty of people would be more than willing to help out.

Even in bars or sporting events, when alcohol is involved and people are heated, the "no fighting" rule is generally in place.

If two guys are in each others' face screaming, their buddies would watch.

Both because that's kind of entertaining.

But also to step in just in case they cross over from verbal attacks to physical attacks.

If a punch or two is thrown, most people would grab their buddies and pull them back.

Getting into a fight may feel good in the moment, but the ramifications can be ruinous.

If one of the fighter's has a particularly good lawyer, the other guy can be financially destroyed.

All these ideas are built in to society and built in to our brains.

To keep random violence from breaking out.

But plenty of times people can mess with your verbally.

And it can be equally devastating.

Especially if it happens in front of others.

Many people are very skilled in covert insults.

The art of putting people down while looking clever at the same time.

Structurally, it's very much like the school yard bully.

The bully doesn't have a lot of confidence.

The only way he can feel better is by putting others down.

This happens socially all the time.

Among friends, this is very playful and necessary.

But when somebody is only pretending to be your friend, it can be devastating.

When you're in a meeting a work, and somebody says something that doesn't quite feel right.

Like they just put you down in front of others.

You know it, they know it, but you feel utterly defenseless.

Sometimes you can TRY to respond, but do so less can confidently, it makes you look even worse.

Some people are just natural bullies.

They are naturally gifted in the art in the covert put down.

Luckily there is a way to respond.

To defend yourself.

Or to utterly obliterate them.

Learn How:


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