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Tame Your Social Instincts


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Humans tend to externalize quite a bit.

It's a very useful instinct.

Imagine an ancient dude is out hunting.

He tosses his spear at a animal and misses.

If he got angry or upset at himself, that would NOT be very effective.

Externalizing, on the other hand, would be very effective.

Getting mad at the animal.

This would cause anger.

Anger would create more energy and motivation.

This worked perfectly back in the day.

When it was US vs. our environment.

US were the people we lived with.

The people we grew up with.

Our environment was other animals.

Other tribes.
Or forces of nature that were treated like people.

The gods of the sky, etc.

Today, our instincts are flip flopped.

Hunger is the easiest to understand.

Back then, the rule was simple.

Eat whatever tastes good.

Eat as much as you can.

Eating as much as you can was necessary because food was hard to find.

Eating whatever tasted good was necessary, since there was a high correlation between good tasting food and healthy food.

Tree bark, dirt, etc., didn't taste good and it wasn't healthy.

Fresh meat tasted good and it was healthy.

So were vegetables, fruits, some plants.

Today, if we BLINDLY follow our hunger instincts, we'll get metabolic syndrome.

Obesity, stress, high cholesterol, high blood pressure.

We have to use our conscious minds to regulate our hunger instinct.

Our externalizing instinct is also similarly messed.

Back then, our environment was stuff that we needed to kill, or was trying to kill us.

Today, our environment is other people.

Back then, trying to kill an animal and getting mad at the animal was very useful.

Today, trying to interact with other people, and getting mad at them if we don't, is NOT a useful strategy.

Luckily, we can use our conscious minds to understand, tame and regulate our social instincts.

Turns out this is MUCH EASIER than regulating our hunger instinct.

Hunger is life or death.

Social instincts are not.

Which means when you figure out HOW to regulate and manage both your social instinct and your externalizing instinct, social interactions are MUCH easier.

Which social interactions?

All of them.

Friends, lovers and everything in between.

Learn How:


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