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There are some very enlightening surprises you'll find once you start to get over any social anxiety.

The first realization is that ALL people have a certain amount of social anxiety.

Everybody is different around new people, compared to close friends.

Everybody is a little bit more withdrawn around new people.

It's common to put people into binary categories.

Introverted, extroverted.

Shy, outgoing.

But in reality, these are very flexible sliding scales.

Nearly ALL people are MORE withdrawn and MORE nervous around people they don't know.

The more they value the unknown person, the more withdrawn they are.

It's EXTREMELY rare to be SO self confident, SO relaxed and comfortable with who you are to NEVER worry about anybody's opinion.

In fact, people who CLAIM they don't worry about other people's opinions are being very self deceptive.

That would be like claiming you NEVER get hungry or sleepy or horny.

Humans are EXTREMELY social animals.

It is a very important and very powerful INSTINCT to be concerned about others.

If somebody really didn't care about what other people thought, they wouldn't spend ANY money on fashion or clothing.

They would go to parties wearing the SAME stuff they wore around the house.

Old sweats, slippers, tattered T-shirts, etc.

But they don't.

The first step is to stop thinking in terms of HAVING something called "social anxiety."

As if only YOU have it, and nobody else has it.

It's not like a cold, that you can catch and then get rid of.

It's part of every normal human's makeup.

It's a matter of decreasing it to MANAGEABLE levels.

If you can't do things you WANT to do, then it's NOT at a manageable level.

If you do things you want to, but you're a little bit more careful, that IS at a manageable level.

Once you start thinking of it like a muscle, that can be weak or strong, you're halfway there.

This will also help you get rid of any "magical thinking."

Anything that sounds like you get any benefit with "one weird trick" is magical thinking.

But if you think of it like muscle, you can exercise it like a muscle.

There is NO rush.

Because you have your entire life ahead of you.

How do you exercise social confidence?




Inside your own brain, your own home, and your own comfort zone.

Five minutes a day is all you need.

Do a little bit every day, and pretty soon social anxiety will not keep you from doing what you want.

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