Jump to content
Mind Persuasion Forum

How To Eliminate Social Anxiety


Recommended Posts



Cialdini laws can be used to explain quite a bit of human behavior.

They are essentially instincts that regulate our social behavior.

William James, a philosopher and metaphysician from about a hundred years ago, said that humans have both a ton of learning capacity and a ton of instincts.

Every other animal has mostly instincts.

We have tons of learning because our brains are still forming for the first couple decades of our lives.

Which means our instincts are more or less programmable.

We need food, but we can choose a whole bunch of different food.

We need sex, but we all have a different idea of an idea sexual partner.

We crave social recognition, but how this happens is different for all of us.

As far as our social lives, we have positive and negative social instincts.

Just like we have positive and negative hunger instincts.

The negative hunger instinct is that the longer we go without eating, the more uncomfortable we get.

The positive hunter instinct is that it feels VERY GOOD to eat something delicious.

The negative hunger instincts drive us away from starvation, the positive hunger instincts kind of reward is when we get food.

Similarly, our social instincts have positive and negative levels.

We are "rewarded" for helpful "tribal behavior" with positive authority validation and positive social validation.

We are "punished" for unhelpful "tribal behavior" with negative authority validation and negative social validation.

In an ancient society, this worked perfectly.

But just like our hunger is troublesome today, so are these combinations of social instincts.

Unfortunately, they are the source of plenty of human misery.

And it happens in a very powerful way that creates a very strong cause-effect relationship.

Since it happens when we are very young, it's kind of built in as an instinct.

That's what happens when we are born with "less than defined" instincts.

How, exactly, does this happen?

Suppose you've got a kid in kindergarten or first grade.

He has a desire to express himself.

But the teacher doesn't agree.

So the teacher yells at the kid.

What is the result?

This kid develops a casual link between the DESIRE to express oneself in public with NEGATIVE social and authority validation.

If this happens a lot, it can cause trouble.

This is EXACTLY why so many people have social anxiety as adults.

We feel a desire to express ourselves.

We START to express ourselves, but then that deep link is triggered.

The one that reminds us that expressing our desires in public will lead to negative social and authority attention.

This is why ANYTHING we want that involves social behavior creates a lot of anxiety.

But there IS a pretty straightforward way to REMOVE this link.

Learn How:


Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

  • Create New...