admin Posted March 20, 2019 Report Share Posted March 20, 2019 There is a clear discrepancy between what we say we want, and what we really want. The things we TELL ourselves (and each other) what we want is based partially on what we SHOULD want. But the things we actively GET, especially when nobody's looking, is what we REALLY want. This is one main reason why marketing studies must be done like medical studies. As objectively as possible. If you ask people for feedback, they'll tell you what they think you WANT to hear. So marketers have to take care to set up special studies so they can OBSERVE what people choose. Similarly, whenever anybody does any medical research, and the data is SELF-REPORTED, it's almost always flawed. Especially if it involves eating. Nobody is totally honest when they report what they REALLY ate. When thinking about humans and attraction, there is a common idea. That you should ignore what people SAY, and watch what people DO. But there is ONE THING that people SAY that want, and also respond to. The ONE quality we all both consciously acknowledge is desirable. And will subconsciously acknowledge as desirable. What is this mysterious trait? A sense of humor. Everybody SAYS they value humor. AND people naturally gravitate AROUND people who HAVE a strong sense of humor. Maybe because humor is a function both an inner and outer game. True outer game humor reflects inner game STRENGTH. Especially self-deprecating humor. This can be VERY DANGEROUS. Many people attempt self deprecation without being 100% congruent. So in a sense, they are kind of fishing for compliments. But if you can use self-deprecating humor with 100% congruence, it will be VERY ATTRACTIVE. Because it demonstrates massive inner confidence. This is the underlying "energy" of the "agree and amplify" response to any playful insults. "Dude, that shirt is ugly!" "I know, right! I got the UGLIEST shirt in the shop! Winner Winner chicken dinner!" This is HARD to pull off if you don't feel it. But if you DO feel it, the surface structure doesn't need to be complex. It can be very, very simple. Paradoxically, the BEST self-deprecating humor demonstrates the STRONGEST confidence around. It's almost like you are proudly challenging anybody to an insult contest. Where YOU can insult you better than anybody else can insult you. Only exceptionally confident people with exceptionally strong frames can do this. Which means that ONLY learning the words aren't enough. You must also build up your inner game. You can learn that here: http://mindpersuasion.com/party-hero/ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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