No Ship And No Captain

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One commonly known "truism" is that you cannot not communicate.

This means no matter what you are doing, you are "communicating."

Often this happens whether you know it or not.

How you sit, for example, gives off certain information.

Even just relaxing and listening to music, we are communicating a great deal.

If you are relaxed, comfortable, and open, that will reflect in your body language.

If you are worried, anxious and closed off, that will reflect in your body language.

All it takes is one quick glance for EVERYBODY to notice this.

Most will notice unconsciously.

So most of this communication that we cannot not do is done FROM our unconscious TO the unconscious of others.

When we use actual words, we are up on the surface level of conscious to conscious communication.

But even then, it's not always clear what we mean.

We even say stuff, and other people ask what we mean, and we don't know.

A lot of our communication comes out of our mouths before we really even have an idea of what we want to say.

If you've ever gotten into a fight with a close friend and said something harsh in the moment, it's hard to undo.

Why did you say that?

We really don't know.

The truth is that there is a HUGE gray area between unconscious and conscious.

A common metaphor is that our unconscious is like a powerful ship.

And our conscious mind is like the captain.

But this is WAY oversimplified.

It is very, very rare where we have a thought, carefully plan and rehearse how we intend to transform that thought into words and then make it reality.

Even if you ever have to give a speech, you might not remember much of giving it.

It's very rare that we are WHOLLY consciously aware of what we are doing.

The BEST conversations we have when we are IN the moment.

When we DON'T plan what we say.

In fact, the more you THINK of specific things to say in situations like that, the more we tend to mess up.

Most everything we do is like that.

A blend of subconscious and conscious.

And not real clear area of where one ends, and one begins.

Sure, some things are purely conscious.

But these are things that require a very high level of skill.

And YEARS of practice.

Anything else is a mix.

No matter what you are doing then, you'll be on the border.

Your skills, your conscious, your unconscious, and the outcome.

The more you try and FORCE a specific outcome, the harder it will be.

The more you relax and let it happen, the easier it will be.

And the more freedom you give yourself to mess up and try again, the quicker you'll improve.

Learn More:

http://mindpersuasion.com/self-help-fail/