The Grownup Pattern

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When we are very young, getting what we need is simple.

We start screaming until somebody fixes whatever is wrong.

When we are happy, we express certain emotions via facial expressions and noises.

Our parents are driven by genetics to feel happy when we are happy, and feel terrified for our safety when something is wrong.

If you have kids, or know anybody who has kids, they'll tell you it changes their value system significantly.

Eventually, though, we all have to grow up.

In ancient societies, this had to happen sooner rather than later.

Getting enough food for everybody was a lot of work.

Lazing around eating while everybody was out working wasn't an option.

If you look around, you'll see these mindsets EVERWHERE.

The childhood (somebody fix me) mindset. (common)

The adult (I'll take care of things) mindset. (very rare)

One is easy, but it's very inflexible.

One isn't so easy, but it is VERY flexible.

With a solid adult mindset, and enough skills (or the willingness to learn) there is not a lot you CAN'T do.

However, these can often times get confused.

For example, think of a typical guy in social situations.

The kind of guy that relentlessly approaches every cute girl he sees.

Is this more adult mindset or childhood mindset?

Most would guess adult, since he's actively getting out there and going after what he wants.

Maybe, but maybe not.

It all depends on how he presents himself.

Most guys present themselves as a "please accept me" either in how they speak, how they feel, or even in the structure of their language.

Getting rejected can ONLY happen to somebody with a childhood mindset.

Getting rejected means you asked for something.

And they said no.

This presumes that the asker was in the childhood mindset, since they were HOPING that SOMEBODY ELSE could satisfy their needs.

Of course, then there are naturals.

These are adult mindset oriented people.

Both men and women.

Because they are just having fun.

After all, social situations are really for relaxing and enjoying yourself.

If you meet somebody, that's cool.

But that is NOT the purpose.

This is one reason why naturals are SO attractive.

They don't NEED anything.

They are TRULY outcome independent.

This doesn't only apply to social situations.

Imagine hiring people for a job.

And most applicants have the, "please hire me! I need this job!" mindset.

Then there's one guy or gal who has the "let's see if this can be a mutually beneficial relationship" mindset.

A true adult mindset is very rare.

Most people walk the earth hoping SOMEBODY ELSE will swoop in and save.

Adult minded people have a certain level of contentment.

And this radiates a COMPLETELY DIFFERENT kind of energy.

One that is insanely attractive.

Not just to potential romantic interests, but to EVERYBODY.

Because in a world of children, the lone adult is sought by EVERYBODY.

How do you BECOME that person?

Here:

http://mindpersuasion.com/presence/