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The Third Path


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When I was a kid I broke my arm on a backpacking trip.

We were two days in, so I had to walk all the way back out.

The adult who walked with me had to dump most of his stuff.

And then take me back to the trail head parking lot, find a way to get me to the hospital, and then go back and catch up to everybody else.

It was a long ordeal.

But I didn't have any choice.

It's amazing what humans can do when we are put into a situation where we have no choice.

One common myth we tell ourselves is that we'll "rise to the occasion."

Meaning when something is really "important," we'll step up and get it done.

But unless we absolutely MUST "get it done," then we'll pretend it's really not something we want.

For example, plenty of guys tell themselves if they actually saw a girl that was "worth talking to" they would "rise to the occasion" and walk over there and start a conversation.

Unfortunately, our fears are VERY EFFECTIVE at hiding from us.

So instead of actually "rising to the occasion," we pretend that she's NOT really worthy to talk about.

Talk to any guy who gets less success than he wants (on the dating market) and chances are he'll blame the market, and not his lack of confidence.

There seems to be only two ways to address this.

Admit you're terrified, go over there and talk to her anyway.

OR, pretend that she's "low quality" and she's not worth your time.

Most guys automatically take number two.

But there is a third path.

One that requires a lot more time, and consistent practice, but is much less scary and requires much less self-deception.

And that is to slowly make it EASY to talk to people.

To convince yourself that you can ONLY judge high or low "quality" after you talk to them.

After all, talking to people is a skill.

If you ONLY choose to talk to people who you subjectively label as "high quality" you'll be severely limited.

Once you train your mind to EASILY talk to anybody, just to see what they're all about, plenty of doors will begin to open.

And it all starts in your mind.

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