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Found 24 results

  1. Having the wrong metaphor can ruin everything. Most everything we perceive is done through metaphors. Our brains have only evolved to really make sense of macro physics. Apples falling from trees, etc. But our brains are also capable of creating and interpreting hallucinations as if they are real. This is how we come up with mythology and other incredible stories. All from looking up at the sky and imagining that the stars are people. As soon as we imagine they are people, we start making up stories about how they interact. Used "correctly" these stories can inspire us and motivate us. Used "incorrectly" we might not stay alive very long. For example, if ALL you did was beseech the gods for healthy crops, you'd die. On the other hand, if you beseeched the gods AND did the job of tilling the soil, planting the seeds, and doing the daily work of making sure everything grew correctly, you'd have a much better chance. The first case would be an OVER-DEPENDENCE on a metaphor. The second case is when you use the metaphor as MOTIVATION or INSPIRATION, but not in place of doing the actual work necessary. We have a lot of metaphors in our daily lives. One of the most dangerous one is to think in terms of perfection. Or to have an objection that is TOO HIGH compared to our level of skills. For example, if you'd been practicing the piano for a couple of weeks, it would be a huge mistake to think you were ready to perform. But this is something we do all the time. We READ something, and think that reading about something is the same as PRACTICING that same thing. For some reason, we think that reading is the same as practicing certain skills. Mostly social skills. We read a book, or have an idea about what we want conversationally. But then we go out and fall on our faces. We are frustrated, but ONLY because we had expectations that were ABOVE our level of skill. If you have your expectations in congruence with your skills, you won't be frustrated. Things like social skills are ALWAYS in progress. Every single person you talk to is going to be a completely NEW experience. An UNEXPECTED experience, since you don't know them. So having an expectation based on a completely unknown situation is illogical. It's much better to dial back your expectations. And see every communication as ENJOYABLE practice. That way you'll eliminate frustration, and keep getting better. Learn More: http://mindpersuasion.com/cb/
  2. Very often, something that feels good in the short term can add up to long term pain. It feels good to sleep in every day, and it sucks to get up at the crack of dawn. But it's easy to imagine how sleeping in EVERY DAY can slowly destroy your productivity. While on the other hand, getting up at the crack of dawn will tend to INCREASE your productivity. Similarly, food that tastes REALLY GOOD tends to add up. The better it tastes, and the quicker it tastes better, the worse it generally is for you. On the other hand, food that is healthy tends to be things you have to acquire a taste for. Or at least acquire a habit of eating. Doing physical labor, or exercise, isn't inherently pleasurable. Only by slowly associating the benefits that come with exercise make it pleasurable. But even then it's not nearly as "enjoyable" as relaxing, or getting a nice massage. This is easy to see when the pleasure is physical. Sleeping late, eating fast food, getting massages. All feel fantastic, and all will have negative impacts on health if that's ALL you do. But mentally pleasurable things are JUST as dangerous. It turns out that in terms of calories per gram, our brain is our most expensive organ. Thinking literally is hard work. Watching TV is easier than studying calculus. But just like jumping from the couch to the weight machine CAN BE dangerous, so can switching your mental skills. If you were 500 pounds overweight, and you wanted to get in shape, you would naturally ease into it. Because if you didn't, you would FEEL IT. There would be a real and present danger of doing too much too soon. I had a roommate once that tried that. Decided he was going to go down to the track and do some sprints. Unfortunately he hadn't worked out in years. After only ONE DAY of sprints, he could barely walk. Messed up BOTH knees. If you jump from the TV to the calculus book, you can do similar damage. You won't exactly break your brain, but it won't be pleasant. And unfortunately, EVERY SINGLE TIME you try something like that, you'll build an association. That doing mental work is hard and painful. On the other hand, if you go VERY SLOWLY, it's much easier. AND you have a much better chance of building the OPPOSITE associations. That doing mentally strenuous work is pleasurable. Just like exercising is for those who do it habitually. It takes while to ease your brain into this. But imagine the things you could do once you train your brain that doing mentally difficult things is enjoyable. Learn More: http://mindpersuasion.com/goal-setting-sucks/
  3. One of the reasons economics is called the “dismal science” is because of the idea of opportunity costs. If you’ve got ten bucks in your pocket, you can buy whatever you can get for ten bucks. Whatever you decide to buy, when you hand over that ten bucks, that’s the direct cost. The opportunity costs are all the things you CAN’T buy once you make your decision. Say you’re in fast food land. And you decide to buy a gigantic carne asada burrito combo with your ten bucks. The opportunity costs are all the things you CAN’T buy once you decide on the burrito. Nachos, burgers, a fat blunt, anything. Opportunity costs are one of the main reason we don’t go after goals. Everybody wants more money, more love, more sex, more free time, quieter neighbors, more respect, etc. But we also enjoy all the stuff we enjoy. And once we start doing things to GET the things we want, we MUST stop doing some of the things we like doing. Even WORSE is the idea that we are wasting our time. Meaning we might spend year trying something that will hopefully get us more money, but what if it doesn’t work? That would be horrible! Not only can we NOT DO the things we would have done (opportunity costs) but the stuff we ARE doing aren’t getting us SQUAT! Instead, we prefer to “imagine” that one day through some kind of “magic” the stuff we want will just “happen” somehow. Without any effort on our part. In the present moment, this is an easy and comfortable thought. But since it’s a fantasy, thinking this way comes with its own opportunity costs. While you are sitting around waiting for the magic wish fairy to show up, you could be doing REAL things that will give you REAL improvement. Developing the base skills that NEED to exist beneath every other skill. The mental practice and rehearsal exercises that will make all other skills easy. The mental foundations of ALL success. What are these, exactly? You can learn all about them. Here: http://mindpersuasion.com/deep-skills/
  4. They say a directionless arrow never misses its target. Meaning if you just randomly shoot an arrow without choosing a target, you can’t miss. On the other hand, if you shoot an arrow at a target, you most definitely CAN miss. Why would you want to shoot an arrow without aiming at anything? Maybe it’s fun. Maybe you like to watch the arrow sail through the air. Maybe you like to imagine your an archer in an ancient battle. None of those guys really aimed. They just sort of picked and angle and hoped for the best. With a bunch of archers on one side of a battlefield, and a bunch of soldiers on the other, you’re bound to hit something. Unfortunately, this isn’t a very good life strategy. Imagine a guy going out to meet girls. Ideally, he’d LOVE to end up with a sex party threesome with a couple of disease-free, porn star freaks. But most normal dudes will take whatever they can get. Which usually ends up not being much. This is like just shooting your arrow in a battle and hoping for the best. Instead, consider the idea of having an actual target. The threesome might be a bit too much. At least in the short term. Believe it or not, having a long term, “horizon goal” of having tight enough game to talk ANY group of females into a sex party is a worthy goal. One that is WAY out there. One that compels you to keep improving. The best way to keep improving is to choose very tiny, very achievable goals. Week one might be getting eye contact and smiles from five ladies. Week two might be getting a few short conversations. Week three might be getting some actual phone numbers. Week four might be going on one date. Most guys DON’T like this. It seems LONG and tedious. Most guys want the sex party RIGHT THE F NOW! But here’s the great paradox of life. The bigger your target is (sex party, for example) the less forward progress you’ll make. The smaller your target, the more RAPID you’ll make forward progress. This is a harsh question, but consider it. Instead of “sex party” swap out any equally desirable goal. Beach house, corporate president, etc. How closer are you to that goal compared to one year ago? Now imagine doing the slow, week by week plan. Assuming you’d stick to it, and make slow, gradual, tortoise like progress, how far would you be in a year? This is the secret to real tangible achievements. The kind that will make your friends ultra jealous. The slower you go, the faster you’ll get there. Learn More: http://mindpersuasion.com/deep-skills/
  5. In sports, a common saying is “leave it on the field.” Which means when you play a big game, you put in 100% effort. So when the game is over, you’ve given everything. This is a fantastic idea for sports. The problem with metaphors like this is when they are misapplied. For example, let’s say you wanted to walk across the room and talk to somebody. The “leave everything on the field” approach isn’t so appropriate. When you’re playing sports, especially an important game, winning is the ONLY thing. (Except maybe for little league...) Any team that loses the championship game and shrugs it off as a learning experience may be missing the point. Imagine your favorite team after losing the superbowl or the world series or the world cup. “Well, we didn’t win, but the important thing was we learned a lot about our capabilities and we tried some new plays which worked out pretty well.” Most people would be understandably angry. But this is an IDEAL response for anything that is NOT sports. In fact, not getting a hundred percent success rate is a very, very good thing. Paradoxically, when you DO get a hundred percent success in anything that is NOT sports, you won’t really know why. Which means you won’t learn much. Which means you won’t get much better. Which means your ONLY strategy is to “get lucky.” On the other hand, shooting for about an 60-70% success rate is perfect. Because everything that DOESN’T work is the best teacher. This hard to wrap your mind around for most people. Especially if ALL you can see is in a short term time frame. Which is why having a LONG term time frame is essential. So long as you see any interaction or event as ONE of many, on a continuous unfolding future, it’s much easier to accept feedback. The more you can accept ALL feedback, most importantly NEGATIVE feedback, the better you can improve. This is easy in the beginning of the baseball season, for example. There are always a lot of games still to be played. How, specifically, can you cultivate this mindset? By creating something called Horizon Goals. Undefined, but positive goals WAY out in the future. At a skill level much higher than you have now. So that any interaction in the present is more easily seen as PRACTICE. Once you see every interaction as partial practice for the next, continuous improvement is simple. Learn How: http://mindpersuasion.com/deep-skills/
  6. Being able to deliberately hallucinate is a great skill. So long as you don’t start to believe in the hallucination. For example, way back when I was in JHS, me and my buddies would play golf. There was a nine hole course next to our school, and it was cheap. Only about $5 for a round. We all had hand-me-down clubs. One particular hole always gave me trouble. Because you had to hit it over the water onto the green. Because I knew the water was there, it made me nervous, and I always hit the ball into the water. Until one day my friend gave me some advice. He told me to pretend the water was really grass. When I did, I didn’t have any issues. It was a very useful hallucination. But if I actually started to believe it, it would have been a problem. Because I would have actually tried to walk across the water as if it were grass. And since the water was actually part of a condemned lagoon, with big signs that said “no swimming,” I probably would have got some messed up lagoon disease. The ability to turn on and turn off hallucinations is very powerful. These temporary hallucinations can be used to either reduce anxiety or increase motivation. So long as you can consciously manage them, they are very useful. One thing they AREN’T is “auto pilot.” Unfortunately, we humans are very attracted to any “auto pilot” idea. As if we can think of something only once, and expect a sudden and permanent change. This is why most self-help programs don’t work. People have the silly idea that simply by passively reading a book, their brains will somehow switch on their own. This is why people find the idea of hypnosis so compelling. It allows them the imagine they can relax, and some other “THING” will do the changes for them. Hypnosis IS a powerful tool. But it is a tool. And tools don’t operate on their own. You could have the best set of tools in the world. And set them next to a pile of perfectly cut lumber. But unless you actively USE the tools, that house ain’t gonna build itself. This is the great paradox of most self-help techniques. The tools ARE powerful. But if they just sit there, the are equally useless. Which means you probably have enough tools in your brain. It’s just a matter of figuring out how to use them. Learn More: http://mindpersuasion.com/deep-skills/
  7. admin

    The Paradox Of Success

    Once I was on this backpacking trip. We were going up over the first pass. If you’ve never been on a multi-day backpacking trip, the first day is always the hardest. You drive up as high as you can and park. Then you walk up and over a pretty high mountain range. Once you get on the other side of that first mountain range, that’s when the fun starts. You more or less walk flat (at least compared to the first day). Huge valleys, no people, meadows, streams, lakes filled with trout, wild animals, etc. It’s all very much worth the first day. And on this particular day, we were going over switchbacks. These long zig-zags that slowly go up to a high mountain pass. On this particular hike, there were a LOT of switchbacks. Going back and forth, slowly upward, for several hours. And each switchback was long. So long that when you got to the end, you couldn’t tell if you were at the top or not. It was VERY EASY to convince yourself you were at the top. You could see the trail going up, and then only blue sky. The closer you got, the more you started to convince yourself that you were almost there. But then you’d get to the end, and you’d have to turn and go up another LONG leg up the side of the mountain. Physical and mental torture all at once. Almost there, almost there, almost there, aw crap! Over and over and over. This how many things in life seem. You’ll be pursuing a goal. So much you’ve got tunnel vision. So much you start to think that once you complete this goal, you’ll be on easy street. Unfortunately, it ain’t like that. Not one bit. Paradoxically, the MORE you convince yourself that the next goal is going to be the culmination of your life, the more motivated you’ll be to get it. But once you get it, and see it’s true context, it CAN be a let down. This paradox is hard to accept. That from the vantage point of the VERY END of your life, they’ll be TONS of stepping stones into your future. But BEFORE you achieve each of those individual stepping stones, convincing yourself THAT is going to be THE ONE is the best way to get motivated. That’s just the way it is. The easiest way to shift from that “aw crap” moment is to just keep on huffing it toward your next milestone. This plays out in many areas. Your financial life, your love life, your career life, your spiritual life, your health. But the MORE of those milestones you achieve, the easier it is to maintain your momentum. And you can start, or re-start, from WHEREVER you are. Learn How: http://mindpersuasion.com/deep-skills/
  8. admin

    Coin Flipping Paradox

    One of the myths of NLP is in it’s most common name. “The Study Of Excellence.” The idea is you can find something that is “excellent.” Then you can study it. And if you study it well enough, you can recreate that excellence yourself. This is how NLP was created in the first place. By COPYING people who were ALREADY excellent communicators. But there are a couple problems with that. Imagine a regular mall. Imagine that mall over the course of about thirty years. Shops come and go. Some last longer than others. Trends change. Demographics change. The economy changes. Suppose in that one mall, that’s been there for 30 years, there are three stores that have lasted the whole time. From the standpoint of “studying excellence,” all you’d have to do would be to “study” exactly what those three stores did, and you could reproduce it. Right? Not really. Because every single year, each one of those stores had NO IDEA whether they would be successful. Put it this way. Let’s suppose you had 64 people, each with a quarter. And each person flips the coin six times. By pure probability, ONE guy would likely get six heads in a row. Now, suppose you walked up to THAT guy and tried to “reverse engineer” his coin flipping strategy. And you thought if you studied him enough, YOU could flip six heads in a row. Pretty silly, right? But this is essentially the SAME THING that happens when you have a mall around for thirty years. Every shop maybe has a fifty-fifty chance of success. So at the end of thirty years, the shops that are around are less “excellent” and more lucky. Sure, staying in business is more predictable than flipping coins, but there IS tons of unknown risk. Otherwise ALL BUSINESSES would succeed. The question, then is HOW EXACTLY can you “study excellence” when MOST SUCCESSES are based primarily on “luck” that is NO DIFFERENT than a coin toss? One way would be to figure how to TAKE MORE CHANCES where you can accept the loss. If you wanted to flip a coin and get six heads in a row, you could. You’d just to keep flipping long enough for it to happen. It might take a few days, but with persistence, the laws of probability DEMAND that it occurs. If you go long enough, it would be impossible to NOT happen. And there are things those successful shops did that INCREASED their chances of success. And there are things YOU can do everyday that will increase YOUR chances of success. Even if you don’t know what that is yet. Learn More: http://mindpersuasion.com/deep-skills/
  9. There’s an interesting theory from classical physics. Chaos theory. It basically says that while the laws of (classical) physics are deterministic, we can’t really predict very far into the future. An example is a two body problem vs. a three body problem. Two bodies is two simple masses in space orbiting around each other. Only those two, nothing else. With only those two, and the laws of gravity, you could take a snapshot at any given time, and using only their starting position, predict what they would look like WAY into the future. But with three bodies, this is impossible. Two bodies means only TWO interdependent variables. The movement of ONE is dependent on the movement of the other. And that other is dependent on the first. But with only two, the math is not too complicated. But add in a third object, and now you’ve got THREE inter-dependent variables. Which makes it impossible to predict what they’d be like. The laws of physics still work. It’s just the math is theoretically TOO COMPLICATED to predict very far into the future. This idea was first discovered with weather predictions. They would take a weather model, on a very powerful computer. They could set the beginning conditions, and then let it play out for two weeks. (Two weeks of computer simulated time). Turns out that EXTREMELY tiny changes in the starting conditions made HUGE changes in only a couple weeks out. This is where they get the idea of the “butterfly effect.” A butterfly flaps its wings in Brazil, and causes a hurricane in Texas two months later. This is why they will NEVER be able to predict the weather very accurately. It’s got nothing to do with the accuracy of the equipment. And EVERYTHING to do with the theoretical and mathematical limitations. Now, a weather system has only a few interdependent variables. Wind speed, temperature, humidity, etc. But what about human nature? How many interdependent variables are there in a lifetime? In a few years? Even few weeks? If predicting the weather a couple weeks out is impossible, how the heck can we predict our lives? This is FANTASTIC news. Because no matter WHAT you are doing now, ANYTHING can potentially happen in your future. With one VERY IMPORTANT restriction. You must accept that YOUR future MUST be created by YOU. NO magic from external entities. No winning the lottery. Only YOUR BEHAVIORS. But when you combine the idea of chaos theory, with daily consistent behaviors, ANY FUTURE is possible. What daily behaviors? These: http://mindpersuasion.com/deep-skills/
  10. Being able to reverse engineer something is a powerful skill. Companies do this all the time. They take apart their competitors product. Rebuild it with enough changes they don’t violate any copyrights. Humans copying other humans is as old as the hills. One of the main driving forces of the Industrial Revolution was everybody was copying the crap out of everybody else. Back then, everything was pretty simple. The first big pieces of industrial equipment were looms. Pieces of equipment that could take raw cotton, and then transform them into textiles. The textiles could later then be used to make clothing and other things. All you had to do was spend a few minutes studying one of these machines, and you could go home and build your own. These looms are the main reason Japan got so rich so quickly. They didn’t need to even grow the cotton. They’d import it, turn it all into fabric, and then export it again. They’d pay a little bit for the raw cotton, and then make a ton selling it as a usable fabric. Of course today, the equipment in our modern economy is a kajillion times more complicated. You would spend all kinds of time walking around some modern production center and not have any clue what they were doing. That’s because what they are doing is based on all kinds of stuff that was done BEFORE it got to that level. With looms, you can see the raw cotton, you can see the loom, and you can see the finished good. Easy peasy. But if you wanted to reverse engineer how to build a computer, and all you saw was the chip fabrication facility, you would be more clueless than when you started. This is the way it is with human behavior. Few human behaviors are as easy to copy as a loom. Most human behaviors are like the chip fabrication facility. Even if you see the surface structure, it doesn’t help much. Imagine if you didn’t know anything about music. And you wanted to copy somebody up on stage jamming on his guitar. Just holding something that sort of looked like a guitar and wiggling your fingers around wouldn’t quite do it. You’d need to study the deeper skills. Music, both playing and writing. Showmanship. Confidence. Reading and responding to the energy of the crowd. And all kinds of business and marketing skills that would get you up on stage in front of paying customers. Luckily, when it comes to many skills, the deep skills are the same. Even for music. And if you start practicing the deep skills, everything on top will be much easier. Learn How: http://mindpersuasion.com/deep-skills/
  11. One puzzling idea from NLP is the idea that there is “no such thing as failure, only feedback.” This is one that people tend to have the most issues with. Partly because it is the most ill-defined “truism” or “presupposition” from NLP. Because “feedback” and “failure” are both MEANINGS given to EVENTS. And since another idea INSIDE NLP is the ability to change meanings of events, this idea is problematic. It’s more of a recommendation than a rule. Kind of like looking both ways before you cross the street. If it’s quiet, and you don’t hear any cars approaching, you’re in pretty good shape. So, what’s the real difference between “feedback” and “failure?” If you are trying to defuse a bomb, and you clip the wrong wire, it’s not really feedback, since you’re blown to bits. On the other hand, your example can be used to teach future bomb-defusers what NOT to do. From your perspective, it’s hard to see it as anything BUT a failure. But from people who later study your failure, it’s clearly feedback. The trick is to turn what we INITIALLY would define as “failure” and be able to redefine it as feedback. For some things, this happens naturally. Practicing sports, for example. If you’re standing there shooting free throws, you won’t sulk and become miserable every time you miss. Especially if you FRAME the sequence of shots as PRACTICE. This is a big clue. By framing how we interpret things BEFORE we go into them, it’s much easier to recognize events as “feedback.” Why do we practice anything? To get better. This means that pretty much ANYTHING you do (except defusing bombs) can be seen within a much larger goal. This is very easy if you have HORIZON goals, and not specific goals. Most goal setting books tell you to set SPECIFIC goals. Not only specifically defined, but at a specific time. This is actually pretty dangerous. Because if you have a specific goal at a specific time, then each step on the way there is going to be much more important. You won’t get the goal unless ALL the intermediary steps are completed on time. With a horizon goal, there’s much less pressure. A specific goal, for example is to make 50% more money in a year. The closer to you get to your target, the more each intermediary goal will seem like a bomb-defusing situation. Do or die. But with a horizon goal, each step is will be EASIER to see as feedback. For example, instead of demanding you make 50% more in a year, have a much broader horizon goal. For example, your money horizon goal can be “I’ll be making a lot more money in a year than I’m making now.” So each thing you try on the way will be easier to get information. And all information, good or bad, can help you to make more money than you are now. This is a key element of success that isn’t usually taught. Learn More: http://mindpersuasion.com/deep-skills/
  12. admin

    The Paradox Of Wealth

    It’s extremely hard to be motivated ONLY by internal incentives. This is a difficult but necessary idea to accept. If you have a good job, with great benefits, high salary, and fantastic coworkers, BUT you’d get fired for being late, getting up early is easy. On the other hand, if you are suddenly wealthy, getting up early (unless that has always come naturally) will be extremely difficult. This is the main reason why lotto winners often end up WORSE off. At first, it’s fantastic. Because the money worries that plague most of us suddenly VANISH. The sudden removal of a NEGATIVE feels very positive. But it also removes all the external incentives that keep us busy. Since everything’s EASY, people who suddenly get rich slip into some pretty bad behaviors. Not criminal-bad, but unhealthy-bad. Without the EXTERNAL and automatic incentives to guide them, they end up drifting. Pretty soon the act of spending money is the ONLY thing that feels good. And once the TRANSACTION is over, the positive feeling that comes from the transaction vanishes. All the THINGS they have don’t really please them. It’s the act of purchasing things that gets their juices flowing. This is a very hard idea to accept. It’s VERY much like the shift from being REALLY HUNGRY to feeling stuffed and miserable. If you’ve ever purposely put off eating, or fasted for any reason, and you ATE TOO MUCH, you know how horrible the results feel. But this is something that quickly passes. The transition from hungry (sucks), to eating (pleasure) to being stuffed (miserable) goes away in a few hours, or at most a day. But the transition to being poor (sucks) being rich (pleasure) and then ONLY getting pleasure from buying things (miserable) can last for a lifetime. And just like it’s VERY HARD to imagine what it’s like to be stuffed WHILE YOU ARE HUNGRY, it’s very hard to imagine how being rich can be miserable WHILE you are poor. What’s the answer? Everything goes in cycles. Eating, being full, sleeping, getting hungry again. That is a very SHORT TERM cycle. BECOMING rich is much, much different than BEING rich. Since there is so much evidence that being rich tends to RUIN people that GET RICH without the requisite effort, this may indicate a very important point. About our true purpose. Not to BE rich. Not to GET RICH easily. But to spend our lives BECOMING rich. This is the proverbial road that is MUCH BETTER than the INN. This is the path upon which we can attain self-actualization. The process of learning and improving and getting closer. What if you don’t know HOW you’ll get rich? Luckily, there is a large collection of foundation skills that lie beneath every other skill. These you can get started on as soon as you want. Learn More: http://mindpersuasion.com/deep-skills/
  13. There are plenty of metaphors about very small things having a significant impact. The plumber who knows where to tap, and gets paid a lot of money for that. The one snowflake that sets off the avalanche. The straw that breaks the camels back. Even Hemingway talked about how people go bankrupt slowly, and then all at once. All of these have a hidden idea of something slowly and continuously building below the surface. And then one “event” makes all hell break loose. But in reality, one straw can’t break a camel’s back. (unless it’s a REALLY weak camel!) One snowflake can’t cause an avalanche. And before that one plumber can walk around and know EXACTLY where to tap, he’s got to spend a lot of time studying and practicing plumbing. This CAN be a dangerous idea. For example, somebody reads a book about the law of attraction. And then they suddenly get rich. And they THINK they got rich BECAUSE of the law of attraction book. But in reality, they got rich because of the things they’d been doing for the past 10 or 15 years. They just HAPPENED to read the law of attraction at the right time. It’s kind of like the Chinese Olympic strategy. How do you win a bunch of medals in the Olympics? First, build a country with a BILLION people. Out of a BILLION people, there’s bound to be a few gold medal athletes. And of ALL the people who FINALLY find success, just by the laws of random probability, there are BOUND to be a few who JUST HAPPEN to read a book or a blog post about the law of attraction. But that doesn’t CAUSE their success any more than if the plumber had listened to a radio show about the law of attraction on his way to the job. Sure, he heard the show BEFORE he tapped the pipe in the right place. But that show didn’t CAUSE him to KNOW what pipe to tap. This is a common logical mistake. Event A happens BEFORE event B. And we assume that event A CAUSES B. Whatever B is, it’s usually caused by a TON of things. Most of which have been building for a LONG time. The REAL question, is what, specifically, ARE those things? Luckily, there are very common deep skills that underlie many specific surface structure skills. So if you get started practicing today, you will significantly INCREASE the probability of a sudden “miraculous” success. Everybody else will think that you just got lucky. But YOU’LL know the truth. Learn More: http://mindpersuasion.com/deep-skills/
  14. If you wanted to be a world class guitarist, you’d need a lot of skills. Least of which would be guitar playing skills. You’d need business skills. You’d need stage charisma. You’d need skills of perseverance. You’d need promotional and marketing skills. Many people have the idea that they just need to be “discovered” to be famous. While that DOES happen occasionally, it’s about as likely as winning the lottery. If you look at any long term success, it will be a person that has a MASSIVE combination of skills. For example, you can find TONS of people on YouTube that are excellent guitarists. But with ONLY skills of playing guitar, YouTube is about as far as they can go. This is how most people think about success. By only looking at the surface structure. This is dangerous. Why? Because to get the skills required to become a world class anything, it would take a LOT of time. But if the surface skills were ALL you had, you’d spend plenty of years practicing ONLY to be on YouTube. That would definitely suck. It’s much easier if you flip things around. Turns out there is a collection of deeper skills that underlie ALL surface skills. Meaning no matter WHAT kind of surface skills you end up using to earn a living, having a strong set of deep skills will make it much easier. In fact, the skills you have NOW are likely enough. At least to get you going. Meaning when you start to practice these deeper skills, it will give ANY skills you have on the surface MUCH MORE power. These are easy, and you can get started today. Learn More: http://mindpersuasion.com/deep-skills/
  15. admin

    Look Below The Surface

    NLP is often called the “study of excellence.” In a way, this makes sense. Most of NLP and was reverse engineered from naturally successful people. None of the techniques were “invented” from scratch. Most of the language patterns, for example, were reverse engineered from Milton Erickson. Erickson actually DID invent them from scratch. But he did so after a LONG period of trial and error. He was a “practicing” physician. The reason they use that word, practicing, is that’s what physicians do. They PRACTICE. Every time they see a new patient, it’s more data and experience that goes into their brain. One of the biggest mistakes in NLP or ANY kind of “self improvement” is they forget the “practice” part. If you were to go to a seminar on learning 14th century French, you wouldn’t expect to leave the seminar fluent in 14th century French. If you were to go a seminar on learning the piano, you wouldn’t expect to leave with full piano skills. But for some reason, when folks go to seminars, and even when they read books, they seem to forget the idea that PRACTICE is always necessary. Take a look at any competitive skill (sports, business, programming) and the ones that are the BEST are the ones that practice the MOST. But in reality, this is only scratching the surface. Some things are easy to practice. You can watch somebody do something, and copy them until you get it right. Shooting baskets, making a cake, etc. But other skills are actually collections of MANY skills. Performing anything on stage, for example, combines many skills. The actual skill. Confidence, poise, focus, etc. The more VALUABLE the skill is, the more collections of smaller skills will be included. Some of these skills are on the surface. The skills you can see. But others are not. These the deep skills. The mental skills. Turns out, that most people are world class ANYTHING have not only the surface skills, but the deep skills. But unless you know what those deep skills are, it’s tough to practice. Because like every other skill, if you don’t practice these, you’ll be missing out on a big part of the picture. But the flip side is that if you DO practice these deeper skills, everything on top will be much easier. These are skills that can’t be seen, or really measured. But they can be practiced. How? Like This: http://mindpersuasion.com/deep-skills/
  16. We live in a very modern world with tons of conveniences. If you were to pick any time period in the history of mankind, it would be very unlikely to be alive today. They say that humans are anatomically, physiologically and mentally the same as we've been for 50,000 years. Any 100 year period out of the past 50,000 years is a chance of 1/500. And you'd only have a 1/230 chance of landing AFTER 1800. Just being alive TODAY is unlikely and very lucky. Life was much harder even 50 years ago. But in some ways, life was better back then. How's that? One thing that is missing from many people's lives today is PURPOSE. Many people feel like they are going through the motions. Without much enthusiasm. Now, you could get very metaphysical and esoteric. Or you could find a very SIMPLE difference. And one VERY SIMPLE difference is in the incentives. Up until very recently, all our incentives were EXTERNAL and very UNFORGIVING. Nobody had to be "motivated." There was no need for motivational speakers or ideas about finding one's purpose. Back then, your environment FORCED you to get things done. Because if you didn't, you'd get left behind. Today, if you want to achieve greatness, you have to be motivated mostly by INTERNAL incentives. It's very easy to relax, get most of your needs met. But it's also easy to get most of your needs met and never feel like you're doing much that is worth much. This is one reason why we LOVE hero's journey movies. In most of those movies, the hero is FORCED onto their path. We would LOVE to have that happen. Something to come along and MAKE US leave our comfort zone. Maybe we'll get bit by a radioactive spider. Maybe a tornado will take us to Oz. Maybe we'll find out an evil wizard killed our REAL parents. Maybe stormtroopers will show up, kill everybody, and FORCE us to go on a mission. Maybe, but probably not. If YOU don't force YOURSELF out of your comfort zone, nobody will. What are you waiting for? Get Started: http://mindpersuasion.com/hero/
  17. admin

    Get In The Game

    We will always have a huge collection of unmet desires. One of the biggest cons of modern society is that we can get anything and everything we want. And that all we need is to want, and we shall have. That just having an identified need is all we require to fulfill it. Economics is called the dismal science for a reason. It forces us to ask a very difficult question: At what cost? Because everything we do manage to get WILL cost something. Somebody needs to produce it. Even if it's made by robots, somebody has to make and maintain the robots. Somebody needs to acquire the raw materials to feed the robot to make the "thing" that we think we "deserve" for free. This is a very, very recent idea. Maybe in the last 30 years or so. For the previous six million years since we split from chimps, and however many millions years before that, getting our needs met was a struggle. A daily, dangerous struggle. Only recently have we been able to convince ourselves of this illusion. That wanting is all that's required for having. Because at the same time, there's never been such a HUGE gap between super rich and everybody else. It's almost as if they've purposely created that myth. The idea of only needing to want in order to get. That way, most of us would sit around wanting. While the rich are secretly getting. But even if you DO get stuff that keeps daily struggles away, it's not satisfying. Humans weren't created to passively receive. To imagine stuff and have it poof into existence. We were MEANT to struggle. Because in the struggle is when we are FORCED to live up to our potential. Suicides are at an all time high. Drug addiction is at an all time high. This is what happens when we are TRICKED into thinking that all we need to do is ASK and we shall somehow RECEIVE. Without TRUE purpose, we are useless. What IS our purpose? What is YOUR purpose? That's what we're supposed to do. Not sit around and wait. Not sit around and hope. But to get in the game, and get some. To RISE to the occasion. To fulfill our purpose. Our human destiny. Learn More: http://mindpersuasion.com/hero/
  18. admin

    Develop Long Game Skills

    The best way to get anybody to do anything is to put it in terms of what they want. Since everybody wants what they want, this makes sense. But most of the time, we ignore this. It's common to tell people to do what WE want because of what we want. Which is the same idea only from the inside out. But if you've ever experienced a very friendly shopping experience, it's the opposite. They ask what you want, why you want it, and what you want to do with it. Then they make recommendations based only on what you just told them. This makes perfect sense. But it requires we turn off our ego and focus only on the other person. This can be frightening. Because any time we turn off our ego, our deep instincts start screaming that WE won't get our needs met. Of course, our instincts can ONLY play the short game. Luckily our higher, thinking brains can play the LONG game. And in the long game, there is long game, and REALLY long game. Generally speaking, whoever has the longest strategy will prevail. One very long game strategy is in understanding very ancient needs. The ones that come beneath words and thoughts. The deep instincts that have driven us before we became humans. When you can take the time to speak to these, you can move people on profound levels. This is what happens when you take smaller stories, and put them together according to themes. And combine gestures and tonality on top of everything to create an emotionally powerful punch. One that moves not just one person, but EVERYBODY who is listening. Not a lot of people can consistently persuade others. Fewer still can get up in front of others and give a coherent speech. And very, very few can weave together a message so powerful it will resonate with everybody. Do this and you'll want for nothing. Learn How: http://mindpersuasion.com/public-speaking-hypnosis/
  19. There are skills and meta skills Individual skills are virtually infinite. For example, if you wanted to be a "skilled" computer programmer, you would never be finished. Every time a new language came out, you'd have to learn it. Same with every other technology based skill. But even non-technology bases skills are virtually infinite. Take storytelling for example. Storytelling has been going on before recorded history. All you need is spoken language. Being the head storyteller of any ancient village or tribe would be a respected tradition. If you are the one talking, and most everybody else is listening, AND you are carefully helping them create imaginary stories, that's a pretty good position to be in. So it stands to reason there would always be guys and gals "trying out" for the "head storyteller" position. A never ending competition of sorts. And every time you have competition, you have creativity. Everybody tries to outdo everybody else. This is the engine behind human growth and invention. Whether the rewards are monetary or not, it's human nature to try and "outdo" each other. Which means ANY skill you intend to learn will be a lifelong process. Luckily, we humans LOVE learning things. We love the feeling of being better today than we were yesterday. In our hearts, we are nomads. Never content to sit still. If we aren't moving physically, we need to be moving intellectually, spiritually, romantically. And continuously learning or improving upon skills is a great way to do that. But among all the skills, there is a META skill. One skill that supersedes all the other skills. Having this meta skill will make life MUCH MORE enjoyable. Not having this skill can make life miserable and pointless. What IS this skill? The self-responsibility to CHOOSE which skill to pursue. Many people don't do this. They choose skills their bosses want the to learn. Or they want to look good to their friends. Or they want to make their spouse happy. These are all fine, but if you don't have ANY skills you are learning just for YOU, you run the risk of living your life ONLY for other people. And plenty of people are very good at sniffing out people like that (who only live for others) and taking advantage of that. But so long as you've got at least ONE skill you are learning for YOUR OWN reasons, you're good. Learn More: http://mindpersuasion.com/nlp/
  20. admin

    The Third Path

    When I was a kid I broke my arm on a backpacking trip. We were two days in, so I had to walk all the way back out. The adult who walked with me had to dump most of his stuff. And then take me back to the trail head parking lot, find a way to get me to the hospital, and then go back and catch up to everybody else. It was a long ordeal. But I didn't have any choice. It's amazing what humans can do when we are put into a situation where we have no choice. One common myth we tell ourselves is that we'll "rise to the occasion." Meaning when something is really "important," we'll step up and get it done. But unless we absolutely MUST "get it done," then we'll pretend it's really not something we want. For example, plenty of guys tell themselves if they actually saw a girl that was "worth talking to" they would "rise to the occasion" and walk over there and start a conversation. Unfortunately, our fears are VERY EFFECTIVE at hiding from us. So instead of actually "rising to the occasion," we pretend that she's NOT really worthy to talk about. Talk to any guy who gets less success than he wants (on the dating market) and chances are he'll blame the market, and not his lack of confidence. There seems to be only two ways to address this. Admit you're terrified, go over there and talk to her anyway. OR, pretend that she's "low quality" and she's not worth your time. Most guys automatically take number two. But there is a third path. One that requires a lot more time, and consistent practice, but is much less scary and requires much less self-deception. And that is to slowly make it EASY to talk to people. To convince yourself that you can ONLY judge high or low "quality" after you talk to them. After all, talking to people is a skill. If you ONLY choose to talk to people who you subjectively label as "high quality" you'll be severely limited. Once you train your mind to EASILY talk to anybody, just to see what they're all about, plenty of doors will begin to open. And it all starts in your mind. Learn More: http://mindpersuasion.com/nlp/
  21. I've sleepwalked only once. I was very young, but I remember it vividly. I was having this crazy dream, trying to get somewhere. But my path was blocked. I think I might have been in a forest or something. But in reality I was at the back of my closet, trying to push through the wall. Now, I wasn't the cleanest kid. My closet floor was covered in junk. The transition from being in dream-land to being in a cluttered closet was pretty disorienting. One of the common tricks when doing stage hypnosis is getting people to forget things. Like the number three, or their name. Then the hypnotist asks them a question (that requires the forgotten word) and audience laughs while they can't remember. The way our biases work, we "negatively hallucinate" things all the time. Cognitive dissonance doesn't allow us to see things that might hurt our ego. Normalcy bias keeps us thinking things are "normal" when they are getting worse. For example, in many public shootings, where some crazy guy walks in and starts blasting away, people hear the shots, but assume it's NOT gunfire. Normalcy bias tricks people so they assume the unexpected loud noises are things like books falling off tables, or somebody dropping dishes. It's as if our brains don't WANT us to see potential danger. Like we have a "hide under the covers and pretend everything is normal" response. Of course, when you compare the amount of stuff hitting our senses, to the stuff we can actually recognize consciously, our poor brains have a VERY tough job. How we see and interpret the world is very much dependent on our filters, our biases, and our beliefs. In investing they have an idea of a "black swan." This is something that allegedly comes out of nowhere and causes the markets to tank. Funny thing is AFTER the fact, everybody can look at it and say, "Oh yea, we should have seen that coming..." Consider the quality of your life is highly dependent on how you perceive the world. Many think they need to change the world, or even change themselves. But what if all you really need to do is change your filters? And by tuning your mind to the correct frequencies, you can have a much easier time getting whatever you want. Learn More: Wealth Tuning
  22. The more skills you have, the better you'll do. This is a pretty broad statement, but consider the basic human problem. We sit here inside our minds, looking out into the world. We either want to get more of something good, or get less of something bad. This could be actual things, like more peanut butter sandwiches and less broccoli pies. Or it could be situations. Less getting screamed at by our boss and more people we like telling (or showing) us they like us back. In between what we want, and where we are, is our reality. And based on how well we operate within that reality, we'll get what we want, or at least closer. Or get a bit further from what we don't want. Some of this happens instinctively. Like when you recoil from something scary, or your pupils dilate at somebody sexy. Next are things we've trained in. Things that operate as if they are instincts. Like learning martial arts. You train your muscles until you respond automatically, without thinking. After that comes conscious choice and conscious action. Whenever we take conscious action, there are another couple things to understand. One is we don't operate on reality itself, but our perception. Second we operate based on our understanding of our own skills. Clearly, there is a lot going on. This is happening all the time. Some of it conscious, some if it unconscious. And we are almost always conflicted. There's always part of us that wants to move forward, but also slightly worried. But the bottom line is the same. We are in the world. And to get what we want, we need to operate on the world. Sure, up to a certain point, all we need to is be open to "receive," but then we learn to walk and talk. And after a certain point, we are responsible adults, and it's all us. Two things will help you. Help you to get more of what you want, and less of what you don't want. One is to continuously update your map of reality. The more you interact with your reality, in various and new ways, the more experience you'll get. The second is to always be improving your skills. The more skills you have, and the more you practice them, the more confident you'll feel. One set of skills that can always be practiced is communication skills. Not just in speaking, but in listening. And not just the stuff that is being said. Everybody can hear that. But the stuff that's not being said. The stuff in between the lines. The hidden truth inside everybody's language, both good and bad. When you can see and respond to THIS deeper truth, you'll have a huge advantage. Learn How: Weaponized Hypnosis
  23. admin

    Learn The Meta Skill

    Some skills are easy to practice, while others not so much. For some skills, we don't even think of them in terms of "skills" or "practicing." Imagine if a high school basketball team felt this way. They only played basketball when they had a game. Not even for warm ups. Clearly, so long as these were normal kids (and not genetically engineered mutants) they would suck. Most people realize that to be good in things like basketball, you need to practice. But for some reason, we look at other skills, and put them in binary categories. Things we can do, and things we can't do. But ANYTHING can be thought of as a skill. Just thinking of it as a skill can get it out of the binary category (can do or can't do) and puts it on a sliding scale. Once you've got that out of they way, all you need to do is practice. This isn't always so easy. Take public speaking for example, most people believe that the ONLY way to practice public speaking is to practice public speaking. Luckily, this is far from being true. Because there are a LOT of components that go into public speaking. Curiously, the MOST IMPORTANT component is usually only glossed over. If you pick up any book on public speaking, they'll have all kinds of tips on how and when to look at the audience, when and how to use gestures, how to make your points, etc. But nothing on the most IMPORTANT part. That same part that is also the most important part of every other communication skill. That part that will take care of the rest of the other parts (the outer mechanics) naturally. Which part is this? The part commonly referred to as "inner game." IF you feel flamboyantly confident, you won't need to "learn" how to "publicly speak." It will come naturally. In fact, trying to learn the "outer game stuff" like gestures and words and eye contact, is kind of putting the cart before the horse. The "horse" which is the inner driver of all behavior, is your inner game. And luckily, there are PLENTY of ways to build up STRONG inner game. Many of them you can do all on your own, so nobody will know anything. Until YOU'VE got the strongest inner game around. Learn How: Stop Manipulation
  24. Can anyone share with me some ideas for affirmations for office skills? I have hard time visualizing doing professional level excel chart documents,powerpoint slides. What are some affirmations to be good at doing powerpoint slides, Microsoft office projects?
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