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Found 6 results

  1. https://loopvids.s3.amazonaws.com/Feb16_Post.mp4 Human brains are incredibly fast. Our brains are capable of AMAZING expressions, thoughts, beliefs and creativity. Unfortunately, most of us use the bulk of our brain power on internal dialogue. Some of this is instinctive. Like when you have a dialogue with yourself before doing something dangerous. If you get a good outcome, you'll be the hero and get the rock star treatment. The action itself it simple. But to build up the courage, you need a lot of "self pumping up." But his can swirl in the other direction. Like a hurricane that might or might not land ashore. Most of our self-talk is protective, which is a good thing. But the stuff we are protecting ourselves from is WAY less real than when our genius self talking brains were calibrated. Before, we needed to do literally dangerous things. Today, most of the dangers are imagined. We imagine talking to somebody, or speaking up in meeting, or making some kind of request or complaint. But then our lightning fast and super genius brains swirl around in an internal typhoon. Imagining tons of good and tons of bad outcomes. This uses a TON of processing power. Which makes normal thinking much more sluggish. There's a common theme deep beneath this thought process. We all have a terrible fear of negative social attention. It's like everybody has X-Ray vision into our souls. This fear of being "discovered" pops up in a LOT of places. We don't say what want to say. We don't ask for what we want to ask for. This is why it's been said (and is generally true) that most humans live lives of "quiet desperation." We KNOW we are capable of doing and getting much more than we have been. And it's very EASY (and probably instinctive) to blame things outside of ourselves. At the same time, we WISH we could express who we REALLY are. We WISH we could speak our minds UNENCUMBERED by false fears. Those that do, get MASSIVE rewards. And they make it seem so easy. There are TONS of metaphors as old as time that describe this. That what we fear simply does not exist. And once we step toward these fears, they vanish. And those who demonstrate this make it look so easy. To say "hey" to pretty people. To make suggestions in a meeting. To hold their ground calmly in an argument, and eventually come out ahead. How can YOU be more like that? How can you FEARLESSLY express your opinions, and more importantly, yourself? It's not a trick or magic or simply muscling up and doing it. It's understanding the STRUCTURE of our inner world, our inner selves, and how they SUPPORT (or don't support) our outer expressions. Build the strong foundation, and the outside is easy. Slowly, steadily, comfortably. Learn How: https://mindpersuasion.com/inner-frame/
  2. Demon Brain Killer: https://mindpersuasion.com/demon-brain-killer/ https://loopvids.s3.amazonaws.com/Aug16ALoop.mp4
  3. https://loopvids.s3.amazonaws.com/Aug10APost.mp4 Most, if not all, of self-help products are consumed "as if" they are entertainment. This is why self help CAN be like an addiction. But other self help is the opposite. The phrase, "self help" is very, very vague. From a purely objective standpoint, it means any thing you do, on your own, to "help" or "improve" yourself. Exercise clearly belongs in this category. If you join the military, or are on a sports team, somebody ELSE will want you to do exercises. Because they benefit from your healthier and more physically fit body. But when you decide to do exercises on your own, for your own reasons, that is the perfect definition of "self help." Similarly, when you learn something complicated, that takes a lot of time. Playing a musical instrument, learning a complex software. This takes time, and effort, and you can measure your progress. Just like with exercise. In exercise, musical training and software teaching, the idea of a "fake guru" or even a "guru" doesn't make sense. There are instructors. If you wanted to get better at ANYTHING, it takes practice. Maybe ten percent study, and the rest practice. Even if you were learning something extremely complicated like Photoshop, you might watch a ten minute video on how to do one thing. But most of your time would be trying all the different ways to do that one thing. Other categories of "self help" are not like this. These are the ones that are consumed like fiction. Which categories are these in? Generally, the "guru" or "false guru" categories are anything requires you talk to or interact with others. Making more money, or improving your relationships. But there are two critical aspects within the "false guru" realm. A very strange combination of laziness and fear. When you decide to get a six pack, the laziness is there, but the fear is not. Nobody gets sweaty palms and heart palpitations as they approach the gym door. But when it comes to improving ourselves through some kind of social skills, this is TERRIFYING. So terrifying that our cognitive dissonance doesn't even allow our brains to think in terms of practice. Instead, we think in terms of magic. Get that one "secret" idea into your head, and sidestep all the necessary work. This is when self help is consumed like fiction. You read a fictional story and go along for the ride. You get to imagine killing bad guys and saving good guys. But you know it's fiction. When you're done, it's back to real life. But with self help, it's not like that. We read self help books, and the hero is our future selves. While we are consuming them, they feel really good. But the thing they are missing is nothing will change without continuous and persistent SKILL BUILDING. However, if any skill building involves fear, we don't do them. So, the trick is to build skills that DON'T require we ever leave our comfort zone. This will make ALL skills easier to master. Especially social skills. Learn How: https://mindpersuasion.com/anxiety-killer/
  4. https://loopvids.s3.amazonaws.com/Aug01Post.mp4 I used to have this boss that everybody hated. She was the owner of the small company, one she inherited. I'd only worked there a year, but even in that time the business had shrunk. I don't know what the deal was between her and the previous partner, but she didn't have much of a clue about business, or general life in general. She'd make really bad decisions, and get angry if people would try and explain to her why they were bad decisions that would cost EVERYBODY money. For example, she had a rule that we had to ALWAYS upsell the customers. Which we never did, since the stuff she wanted us to upsell was utter crap. And we all knew that if we tried to upsell customers, even REPEAT customers, they would STOP being customers. Even then, when she found out we were not upselling, she'd get angry. One time I ALMOST lost it with her. Like scream out loud lost it. But I bit my tongue. I was working a project that had a very tight deadline. But I was using the main office computer. (This was over 10 years ago). I was using both Excel and Word, and a LOT of data. But she interrupted me, wanting to do something else WHILE I was doing what I was doing. She wanted to burn a bunch of CDs or something. She said it wasn't a big deal, since it would work in the "background." I tried to explain that "in the background" meant we had to SHARE the processor. Which would make my task take much longer. But she wouldn't have it. Every time I'd try to do a hefty calculation, my spreadsheet would freeze. But because she couldn't see her process, she thought it didn't have any impact on the stuff I was doing. Worst part was I had to sit RIGHT NEXT to her while my task, which should have only taken 20 minutes, took nearly two hours. When bosses don't understand what their employees go through, it can create some office turmoil. When bosses aren't driven by customers, but their own ego, it can create office turmoil. When you're trying to do something on your PC, but it keeps freezing, because there's a CRAPTON of stuff going on in the background, it can create turmoil. But this same CRAP happens inside your brain. You see something you'd like. Part of you wants to go and get it. Part if you is afraid to. Those two parts start an argument. In the BACKGROUND of your mind. So, what does this do to your PERFORMANCE? It FREEZES. Just like my spreadsheet. But if you clean house, get rid of all the horrible, second guessing bosses that live in your subconscious, and all the sticky BLOATWARE that exits in your brain, EVERYTHING will improve. Your performance. Your mental speeds. Your linguistic and perceptual acuity. Your ability to REALLY understand what other people are saying and respond accordingly. It's like getting a brand new brain! Learn How: https://mindpersuasion.com/anxiety-killer/
  5. https://loopvids.s3.amazonaws.com/July29Post.mp4 There are a lot of sayings in the self development area that are kind of true. But there are also some that are dangerous. One of them is about fear. "Do the thing you fear, and the death of fear is certain." This CAN be helpful if it gives you the motivation to move forward. But it's also a bit too vague. From a purely biological point of view, you don't really "kill" fear when you "do the thing you fear." You do something that's scary. This creates a lot of adrenaline. That adrenaline CAN be a good feeling. But ONLY if you succeed. The adrenaline response fuels the fight of flight response. Fighting or running away takes a long time. So any time we do something that SEEMS scary, our biology is going to respond as if it IS scary. And if the length of the scary thing is short, AND we are successful, then we'll get a positive adrenaline rush. Jumping out of an airplane, for example. The fear is REAL. The adrenaline that comes from jumping is VERY STRONG. But the time it takes to reach "terminal velocity" when you STOP accelerating, is very short. So you experience a kind of "floating" sensation while that adrenaline is still flowing. This is the basic "thrill seeker" high. A DRUG. The adrenaline response that comes EVERY SINGLE TIME. Or consider something that's only dangerous from an "imagination" level. Public speaking. There is ZERO danger. But because it feels dangerous, your ancient instincts respond as if it IS dangerous. So when you give a decent speech, get some genuine applause, that FEELS fantastic. But this fantastic feeling only comes if you TAKE ACTION and that action is SUCCESSFUL. This doesn't work very well in social situations. At least not as binary as jumping out of airplanes or giving speeches. Even if you give a lousy speech at a friendly place, you'll still get that adrenaline rush. That rush that comes from POWERING through the fears. But when you walk up and talk to somebody, it's a different animal. It's NOT just a matter of turning off your brain and getting it done. You NEED your brain. You need to listen and respond appropriately. This is when the "feel the fear and do it anyway" idea is LOUSY advice. If you're "feeling the fear" you won't come across as confident and relaxed. Being confident and relaxes is IDEAL in social situations. A better way would be to KILL the fear before you even start. So you FEEL confident, relaxed. Where you'll be the most effective, conversationally. How do you do that? Learn How: https://mindpersuasion.com/anxiety-killer/
  6. https://loopvids.s3.amazonaws.com/Jun04Post.mp4 Steve Martin made a movie a long, long time ago called, "The Lonely Guy." He didn't have any friends. He'd go out eat by himself. He'd have a "cover" that he was a food critic. But that was after he'd sat down. When he'd walk in, and ask for a table for one, everybody would stop. All the people in the restaurant, in the middle of their conversations, would stop and look at him. They'd even have a spotlight on him. This is how it feels for most of us, when we go social places alone. "Hey! Who is that weirdo? Why doesn't he have any friends?" We even get this feeling when walking across a room to introduce yourself. As soon as we live the safety of our group, or the safety of the wall we are leaning against, we feel exposed. As if everybody is going to STOP what they are doing and watch us. "Hey! Everybody! Look at that guy, all by himself, walking across the room to talk to that pretty girl!" The truth is, nobody really think this. Unless you are PROJECTING that kind of energy. The nervous, "I'm doing something wrong" energy. The "I'm doing something I shouldn't be doing" energy. How can you NOT project that energy? Easy. Don't FEEL that energy. Yeah, I know, much easier said than done. But guess what? The energy you feel, and project, is something you can PRACTICE. For example, imagine you'd never ridden a unicycle before, and you tried to ride it across the room. If you were uncertain and off balance, it would show on your face. People would watch you, but they would feel a certain way. A "hey that guy's about to crash" kind of way. But suppose you practiced? Suppose you rode a unicycle across the room with a confident and playful expression across your face? They'd look at you much DIFFERENTLY. You can practice feeling comfortable in social situations JUST LIKE you could (if you wanted to) practice riding a unicycle. Social situations require skills. Skills take practice. So long as you practice slowly, you'll get better. But here's the thing. If you became a super confident unicycle rider, what would that get you? It might be a cool party trick. But riding a unicycle, in and of itself, doesn't do much. After you get over the thrill of learning something difficult, it'd be boring. But social skills come pre-loaded with plenty of good feelings. Humans are social animals. Which means the more social skills you practice, the more you'll enjoy life. Get Started: https://mindpersuasion.com/social-charisma/
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