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Found 68 results

  1. Most people never think about words. Well, most people never think about much of anything. We just kind of show up, do what everybody else is doing, and call it good. But everybody who's ever made a ton of money, or made an impact has done something BEYOND just showing up and following the crowd. Some of these folks are inventors. Some of them are artists, or creators. But you don't have to think in terms of monumental achievements to have some fun. Because smack dab in the middle of the space between thoughts and words is a HUGE playground. Most people never think about how they think. Most people never think about what they say. But right there, between thoughts and words is a potentially ENDLESS playground. If you want, you can leverage this potential to make a lot of money. If you want, you can leverage this potential to have a lot of sex. Or, really help people get over internal blocks. Or, if you are the wallflower type, just pay close attention to the way people speak, the words and linguistic structures they use, and see what's REALLY on their mind. There have been a few characters or archetypes who can read people's emotions. These characters use this skill to become expert negotiators. This is VERY possible. Not just in the movies, but in your life. YOUR life. It requires taking some time to learn the atomic bits of linguistic thought processes. But after you take the time to awaken your understanding of these ideas, you will have huge insight into people's subconscious thinking. You will be able to understand MORE about their deep desires and fears than they do. If they are your enemy, you will be able to crush them. IF you want them on your side, you'll be able to leverage their subconscious desires with incredible effectiveness. Even if you NEVER want to apply these skills, being able to peer deeply into their subconscious minds WILL feel like a super power. Of course, you can have a bit of fun as well. Twisting people's thoughts into pretzels is a fine hobby. One that will make you the star of any party and social scene you like. Becoming a master of words is something that has TONS of applications. And all you need to practice is a pen, some paper and your brain. Nobody needs to know but you. Learn How: http://mindpersuasion.com/party-hypnosis/
  2. Dale Carnegie came across a lot of golden tips back in the day. He started his deal during the depression. When people were struggling. Kind of like today. All his ideas in his famous book, "How To Win Friends And Influence People," came from a public speaking club he founded. It was kind of a lab for interpersonal ideas. People would go out and try things, and come back, and give a speech. The speeches were restricted to ONLY two minutes. So they had to be quick, they had to be engaging, and they had to be packed with information. One of the golden nuggets was the idea of HOW, specifically, to be interesting TO other people. This, of course, is a deep human desire. To meet somebody, make an impression, and get them interested in you. Either for romance or for business, this skill would obviously come in VERY handy. The simple takeaway that Carnegie found was to be interesting TO other people, all you really need to do is be interested IN them. Now, this sounds simple. But most people have trouble with this simple advice. Why? Because most people find other people kind of boring. But here's the thing. It's EASY to be interested in interesting people. Being interested in interesting people won't get you very far. And you'll have tons of competition. Because if YOU find somebody interesting, so do plenty of other people. This is why attractive females have it so easy. Tons of dudes are always hanging around doing whatever she asks. A real skill is to be interested in the PERSON. Not the appearance. This is pretty easy once you take apart the structure of language. When you learn to ask a few questions and follow up questions. By looking at the relationship between their thoughts and their words, your interest in them will go far deeper than anybody else's. Especially when you use covert hypnosis to significantly amplify their existing desire. EVERYBODY wants something. So much that this pretty much all anybody talks about. So if you can turn off your own brain, listen to their desires and use the patterns from covert hypnosis to EXPAND their desires, they'll remember YOU much more than anybody else. Learn More: http://mindpersuasion.com/party-hypnosis/
  3. Everybody loves a fantasy. One of the biggest inflection points of the hero's journey is in the beginning. Usually, the hero is offered an opportunity to go on a journey. But they turn it down. Later, something happens, and they are FORCED to go on the journey. We normal humans like this very much. Why? Because we all have a love-hate relationship with our comfort zone. On one hand, we hate that it's so constraining. We'd LOVE to be able to step outside of it and get some of the good stuff that we KNOW is out there. But at the same time, the idea of deliberately going outside of our comfort zone is TERRIFYING. So much that we hate the idea of doing it alone. Which is why we LOVE this part of the hero's journey. When the hero is FORCED to go outside of his or her comfort zone. When they don't have a choice. Because we would LOVE something like that to happen to us. This is essentially how most of us live our lives. WAITING for something to happen. Because most of us are terrified of making something happen. This is true on big, life changing levels. This is true on tiny, daily, normal social situation levels. For example, we're at a party with some friends. We go to parties because we love the idea of meeting new and exciting people. And having new and exciting experiences. But we're also kind of too scared to make that happen. This is where YOU come in. Because with a little bit of thinking, YOU can be the one to set people free. YOU can be the one to give them an exciting experience. It's all based on how you speak to them. Because smack dab in the middle of every word you speak and hear is MAGIC. (Here is magic...) Potential to make every conversation a life changing experience. A memorable experience. Needless to say, if you walk the Earth giving out experiences like this, people will remember YOU as the one who set them free. That same archetype who teaches the young and clueless hero what's what. You'll find one in every hero's journey story. And you can BE one everywhere you go. Learn How: http://mindpersuasion.com/party-hypnosis/
  4. Everybody loves a sense of humor. It's rare that humor doesn't have a place. But developing a sense of humor can seem difficult. You could try and memorize a bunch of jokes. Which could work, but then again it could backfire. Timing is an important part of humor. If you tell the wrong joke at the wrong time, you'd be better off having kept your mouth shut. Being funny in a SPONTANEOUS way is much better. A very basic and common way would be to simply know a whole bunch of jokes and anecdotes. So when somebody says something, you can say: "That's like the guy who..." and away you go. So long as the joke is relevant, you'd be pretty good. However, it would also be clear that all these anecdotes would be MEMORIZED. It would be a kind of prepared spontaneity. This is how many stand up comedians make it LOOK LIKE they are riffing in the moment. The art of improvisation is learning to work with WHATEVER you get. However, being able to accept everything that is coming at you, and responding with MEMORIZED humor still requires you MEMORIZE a ton of jokes. This is what those world class improv guys do. They memorize a TON of short routines on a TON of subjects. So no matter what comes AT them, they can flip it around into something funny. From a structural standpoint, this is the same as a salesperson who practices overcoming TONS of objections. And in TONS of different ways. If you want to develop your sense of humor, do you need to go to all this work? No, you do not. It's much easier to notice the build in "funny" structure of language. Once you get the hang of this, you can easily riff on ANYTHING anybody says. Not only for humor, but for mind bending silliness. This comes from understanding the structure of hypnosis. Not direct hypnosis, where you walk around swinging a watch. But COVERT hypnosis. Where the only person who knows what's going on is you. Once you learn the structure of covert hypnosis, you'll find TONS of opportunities built into every day language. This will give you a huge range of riffing potential. Turning statements into silliness. Turning certainty into confusion. Even getting away with saying the CRAZIEST things. Things that make people laugh out loud, and then suddenly forget. In between thoughts and words is TREASURE. Treasure that only you will be able to see. Learn How: http://mindpersuasion.com/party-hypnosis/
  5. If you ever get stuck in a social situation and you don't know what to do, it's usually too late. Humans behave BEST when we are operating mostly subconsciously. Automatically. In sports, the coveted flow state is when you are operating at a very high level AND mostly unconsciously. When it seems like you are WATCHING yourself perform. This can happen socially as well. For most of us, this happens with close friends with whom we have a ton of built in rapport. This is when conversations flow and good times roll. But it is also possible to create this social flow state with people you've just met. This requires we think a little meta. If you want to get good at something, you have to practice. The more you practiced, the higher level of unconscious competence you'd become. For example, it's pretty easy to get to the level of unconscious competence playing "Mary Had a Little Lamb" on the piano. But getting to that same level of unconscious competence while playing something like Beethoven's Moonlight Sonata would take a LOT more practice. So how can you develop unconscious competence, that flow state, with social situations involving people you DON'T KNOW? By practicing talking to people you don't know. Most people don't like this idea. They only like the idea of talking to somebody they are interested in. This is actually a form of self-deception. They think about being social and outgoing around EVERYBODY, and it scares them. So they cover up this fear by saying things like, "Why would I talk to THAT person? I'm not interested in them!" But by practicing friendly small talk with EVERYBODY, you'll be practicing social skills on a META level. And you'll soon get to know "people" on a structural level. After you talk to ENOUGH people, you'll realize TWO THINGS about everybody. One, that everybody is unique in some way. Two, everybody is VERY SIMILAR in many ways. And once you feel this similarity on a deep and unconscious level, all fear will VANISH. This means talking to anybody NEW will seem familiar. Which means it will be much easier to enter into that free flowing, outcome independent flow state. Which everybody finds INSANELY attractive. This REQUIRES that you see small talk as something you PRACTICE. Not something you do because you ONLY enjoy it. That would be like somebody who doesn't exercise because they don't enjoy it. It takes a while to ENJOY exercising. And it will always be BOTH a means and an end. So will small talk. It may suck to think of practicing it. But when it becomes both a means and an end, you will be developing some very rare, and very attractive, social skills. Learn More: http://mindpersuasion.com/girls-like-you/
  6. Imagine two fighters. Boxers if you will. One guy has spent tons of time practicing lots of techniques. The other guy, not so much. But the first guy, with all the moves, is in very terrible condition. He is barely able to stand up after a couple minutes. He's so exhausted, he hangs on to the other fighter for dear life. But the second fighter, the guy who has very little techniques is in VERY good shape. He can dance and around and bounce on his feet for a full twelve rounds. Who do you think would win the fight? Unless the first guy got lucky, he would be too tired to do much. None of his advanced techniques would do squat if he was too tired to lift his arms. When it comes to any kind of martial art, it's clear that physical conditioning is as important, if not more, than the actual fighting techniques. Now, this metaphor is not entirely realistic. Because it would be hard to practice fighting techniques without also getting into shape. So we can imagine another pair of fighters. This time, their skills are equal. But one guy is in WAY better shape than the other guy. Obviously, the guy who was in better shape would win. What's this got to do with anything? When it comes to social behavior, interactive social behavior, there is inner game, and outer game. Outer game is kind of like the technical skills. Knowing what to say, and how to say it. Inner game is much more like physical conditioning. In a fighting metaphor, if you are too tired, you can't really use any of your technical skills. In a social situation, a weak inner game means you'll be spending A LOT of brainpower being worried or anxious. So any of the stuff you practiced before won't to mind. This is EXACTLY what happens when you practice a speech until you've got it down PERFECTLY. But then when you stand up to give it, it VANISHES from your brain. Your brain essentially freezes. This is why having solid inner game is much, much more important than any outer game techniques. But most people don't pay much attention to inner game. Since most people don't know HOW to strengthen their inner game. Most people simply assume that stronger inner game comes from experience. But this is incorrect. In fact, there are plenty of ways to build up a rock solid inner game, just like you could build up rock solid conditioning. You can do this alone, without needing to interact with anybody. And the longer you practice, the stronger your inner game will be. Learn How: http://mindpersuasion.com/party-hero/
  7. One way to understand attractive personalities is to think in terms of ancient societies. Our brains, bodies and instincts are the same as they were tens of thousands of years ago. We humans just don't evolve very quickly. So, what personality characteristics are MOST attractive? The biggest problem in ancient societies was getting enough food. Of handling problems that came up during that process. Back then, you HAD to be productive. You had to be able to get stuff done. And the more stuff you could get done, the more TRUE CONFIDENCE you would radiate. Not confidence based on anything fake. Confidence based on real memories of real experiences where you were successful. This may not be something you want to hear, but humans send and receive a TON of information via subconscious body language. So if you truly FEEL confident, everybody is going to know. If you are trying to fake confidence, it may work for a little while, but it won't last through a conversation. This is exactly WHY girls test guys. To see if their confidence is REAL or FAKE. Just that she's testing you is a bad sign. If she is testing you, her subconscious DOUBTS your confidence. But it's easy to create REAL confidence, even if you don't feel it. At least right now. The trick is not to conjure it up in the moment. This is the FAKE confidence that invites frame tests. Real confidence can be built using ONLY the memories in your brain. It takes time, but it is VERY POWERFUL. You can do this with any emotional state you want. Even building in various switches for various emotional states. People that are naturally charismatic and outgoing do this NATURALLY. Meaning they NATURALLY recall and reference positive memories. This creates a string of positive experiences. Which keeps the whole positive charisma cycle going. You can, however, jump start this process. Kind of like priming a pump. Just take some time, find plenty of decent memories and PURPOSELY reference those. And you can create that SAME outgoing, friendly, charismatic attitude. This is THE most important thing. It only seems like it's not because so FEW people have this natural, outgoing charm. But when you take the time to build it, you'll see. Once you have a collection of positive inner game states, layering some outer game behaviors on top will be EASY. Making you the most attractive person around. Learn How: http://mindpersuasion.com/party-hero/
  8. There is a clear discrepancy between what we say we want, and what we really want. The things we TELL ourselves (and each other) what we want is based partially on what we SHOULD want. But the things we actively GET, especially when nobody's looking, is what we REALLY want. This is one main reason why marketing studies must be done like medical studies. As objectively as possible. If you ask people for feedback, they'll tell you what they think you WANT to hear. So marketers have to take care to set up special studies so they can OBSERVE what people choose. Similarly, whenever anybody does any medical research, and the data is SELF-REPORTED, it's almost always flawed. Especially if it involves eating. Nobody is totally honest when they report what they REALLY ate. When thinking about humans and attraction, there is a common idea. That you should ignore what people SAY, and watch what people DO. But there is ONE THING that people SAY that want, and also respond to. The ONE quality we all both consciously acknowledge is desirable. And will subconsciously acknowledge as desirable. What is this mysterious trait? A sense of humor. Everybody SAYS they value humor. AND people naturally gravitate AROUND people who HAVE a strong sense of humor. Maybe because humor is a function both an inner and outer game. True outer game humor reflects inner game STRENGTH. Especially self-deprecating humor. This can be VERY DANGEROUS. Many people attempt self deprecation without being 100% congruent. So in a sense, they are kind of fishing for compliments. But if you can use self-deprecating humor with 100% congruence, it will be VERY ATTRACTIVE. Because it demonstrates massive inner confidence. This is the underlying "energy" of the "agree and amplify" response to any playful insults. "Dude, that shirt is ugly!" "I know, right! I got the UGLIEST shirt in the shop! Winner Winner chicken dinner!" This is HARD to pull off if you don't feel it. But if you DO feel it, the surface structure doesn't need to be complex. It can be very, very simple. Paradoxically, the BEST self-deprecating humor demonstrates the STRONGEST confidence around. It's almost like you are proudly challenging anybody to an insult contest. Where YOU can insult you better than anybody else can insult you. Only exceptionally confident people with exceptionally strong frames can do this. Which means that ONLY learning the words aren't enough. You must also build up your inner game. You can learn that here: http://mindpersuasion.com/party-hero/
  9. Imagine you were just about to walk into a party. And RIGHT before you opened the door, a super sexy person gave you a super sexy look. That would put you in a very GOOD mood. On the other hand, imagine the opposite. Right when you were about to walk into a party, a dog came up and peed on your leg. And the dog's owner, and all her friends, stood their laughing. That would put you in a very BAD mood. Most people accept this as normal. Stuff happens OUTSIDE of us. Then that puts us in a certain mood. That certain mood affects our behavior. Which affects the stuff around us. The people, etc. That can either KEEP us in a bad mood, or KEEP us in a good mood. If we happen to run into a string of GOOD things happening around us, we'll be in a GOOD mood. On the other hand, if we run into a string of BAD things happening around us, we'll be in a BAD mood. We say we're having a BAD day. Or we're having a GOOD day. But here's the thing. It's not really the THINGS that are happening around us. Once they happen, they are OVER. But their memory lingers for a while. In a sense, our conscious is a never-ending stream of what is happening, what we THINK is about to happen, and what just HAPPENED. And what JUST HAPPENED is projected forward slightly, affecting the events AS they happen. But we CAN have a huge amount of control over this. It's not based on magic, or metaphysics. Any more than doing pushups would make you stronger. Or running every day would burn body fat. If you PRACTICE remembering certain things, you can build up the STRENGTH of those memories. Build them up strong enough, and you can recall them whenever you want. So much that they can OVERPOWER anything that is happening around you. Putting you in such a good mood, that YOU become the CAUSE. And everybody else's mood will be an effect. Giving you the power to CHANGE the mood of everybody around you. What kind of memories do you want to recall? What kind of feelings do you want to HAVE whenever you want them? Any kind you want. So long as you are willing to build them, you will have them. You can build them as STRONG as you want. There is NO upper limit. Any feeling, any time, anywhere. A frame so strong that EVERYBODY wants in. Learn How: http://mindpersuasion.com/party-hero/ Till next time, George Hutton
  10. Being an entertainer is a valuable skill. Most of PUA tactics include demonstrating value. The bulk of the Mystery Method involves doing various bar tricks. Magic tricks, sleight of hand tricks, etc. They all have the same thing in common. Of the person you are trying to impress not needing to do anything. If you have plenty of tricks up your sleeve, this can be a fantastic way of standing out. Since most goofs CAN'T, even a couple of tactics can work wonders. But they do have their drawbacks. For one, if you happen to REALLY hit if off with somebody, you'll eventually run out of material. Once the REAL YOU comes up, it might not be the same. If you've ever seen famous comedians or actors when they are NOT being filmed or interviewed, they are MUCH DIFFERENT than on stage. Of course, if you're ONLY after hit-and-run fun, then having a half hour of material is really all you need. Show up, demonstrate value, pick your prize and have fun. However, if you want to develop deeper relationships, you'll need to be MORE than an entertainer. This is the other half of being socially outgoing that most people miss. There's a lot more than just showing up and entertaining the crowd. The flip side is how comfortable you make others feel. If you can not only tell a few jokes, and create good feelings, but also help shy folks come out of their shell, you'll be head and shoulders above any one-trick pony. And it turns out that easing others out of their shell is pretty easy. Even better, the longer you do it, the easier it gets. It's opposite being an entertainer type. The longer you entertain, the HARDER it gets. People start to build expectations. That's why it's usually only good for short term fun. But if you want to create REAL relationships, with friends, lovers, and everybody in between, then having the "make others feel comfortable around you" skill is a definite plus. It's easy to learn, and easy to do. And after you practice it for just a few minutes, they'll actually remember YOU much more than the tricksters. Why? Because EVERYBODY can enjoy the trickster. They do the same tricks for EVERYBODY. But when you flip the script, and find out what's important about ONE person in particular, then they KNOW you are focused ONLY on them. Which means they'll remember you much, much longer than anybody who's telling jokes or doing magic tricks. Learn How: http://mindpersuasion.com/party-hero/
  11. One flexible source of meaning is any cause-effect. Our brains seem to struggle with any kind of cause-effect. If you are a scientist, and you need to PROVE that A causes B, it's not so easy. A common phrase that illustrates this is the famous, "correlation doesn't imply causation." Somebody, either in person or online, will mention that something causes something else. Or they'll imply it with the many handy linguistic tools built in to our brain. Then somebody will wisely say (or post): "Well you know, correlation doesn't mean causation." These can lead to some interesting discussions. And some heated arguments. But they can ALSO lead to some pretty funny statements. Or purposeful "misinterpretations" of what people say. Our language is FILLED with ambiguities. If you were to learn to SPEAK in ambiguities, it would take a while. But it would be INSANELY powerful, as speaking articulately and specifically in terms of ambiguities is what covert hypnosis is all about. But if you can pluck out any of the ambiguities that we silly humans say all the time, and PURPOSELY misunderstand them, it can be VERY FUNNY. Not just cause-effect statements, but something called "scope ambiguity." A scope ambiguity is the driving force behind the famous Groucho Marx joke: "Last night I shot an elephant in my pajamas. How he got into my pajamas I'll never know!" Once you train your brain to SEE these, you'll see them EVERYWHERE. For example, let's say you have a friend who said she went out to get the paper in her bathrobe, and her neighbor saw her. "The other day I was getting my paper and my neighbor saw me in my bathrobe. It was pretty embarrassing!" You COULD say: "Your neighbor? In your bathrobe?" To which your friend would say: "Yes!" To which you'd reply in mock horror: "What was your neighbor doing in your bathrobe?" Obviously, this is pretty silly. But it's also very EASY. And it's also potentially very CATCHY. Meaning if your friend is in a playful mood (if you're at a party or a bar and the drinks are flowing) she can play along with the "new reality." This what happens when you build a party frame. Somebody says something normal. Which most people do most of the time. Then YOU take it and REFRAME it into something goofy. Since a fun, goofy frame is BETTER than a normal, boring frame, people will tend to join in. And play along with the idea that your friend has a weird neighbor that is somehow sneaking into her house and getting her clothing. And then standing outside wearing it like no big deal. Once you train your brain to reframe cause-effect statements and scope ambiguities, you'll see them EVERYWHERE. Giving you TONS of opportunities to make people laugh out loud. Learn More: http://mindpersuasion.com/party-hero/
  12. One of the biggest stumbling blocks is our natural inability to live with uncertainty. This "fear" comes across in many ways. We have a ton of biases, things that filter out things our subconscious doesn't want us to see. Cognitive dissonance is a general term for many of these. There is something in our environment, or a certain interpretation of something in our environment, that represents DANGER to our ego. So our cognitive dissonance, or a collection of biases, KEEPS US from seeing that. Any time we can avoid admitting that we SUCK, or we MIGHT SUCK, this pops up. And our brains are VERY CLEVER and VERY SLIPPERY in how it manifests this. For example, you'll read about a "strategy." Usually a strategy that is based on some kind of social interaction. A complex social interaction that will either get you affection or money. The TWO THINGS that are the most important. Since they (money and sex) represent survival and reproduction. But if the strategy involves ANY KIND of uncertainty, this can be very troubling. Our lightning fast subconscious will extrapolate. We'll imagine trying that strategy, and failing. And that means if we fail, we WILL NEVER get money or sex. Since this represents a huge FAILURE on a deep level, we don't even ALLOW OURSELVES to contemplate this. So we REFRAME our fears into strengths. And we do this on a SUBCONSCIOUS level, so we don't even know we are doing this. This usually comes across consciously as being skeptical. We express this "healthy skepticism" as wanting PROOF that the strategy works. After all, only a MORON would rush forward and try something so foolish, right? At least this is what we tell ourselves. Unfortunately, with a little bit of uncomfortable SCIENTIFIC LOGIC, this need for proof is actually IRRATIONAL. See, if there was any PROOF that any money or romantic strategy worked, that would mean some IMPOSSIBLE THINGS. For one, the OTHER PEOPLE we would be using these strategies on would be ROBOTS. If we could see ONE PERSON using a strategy, and we expected ourselves to use that exact same strategy, and get the exact same results, that would also mean that WE are robots. The truth is that EVERY interaction between any two humans involves a TON of uncountable and immeasurable variables. You have the same conversation with the same person on two different days, and you'll get two different results. Two different people try the same pick up line on the same girl, and they'll both get different results. So the idea of waiting for "proof" is illogical. And it ONLY serves to protect your ego. The real secret to getting anything is to TRY SOMETHING. Something where you DON'T KNOW what is going to happen. This is the only real way to learn anything. Fortunately, most people are TERRIFIED of doing this. Which means if YOU can, and do it consistently, you will CLEAN UP. Money, love, success, whatever you want. Get Started: http://mindpersuasion.com/long-game/
  13. When I was a kid I loved geometry. It was one of the only classes where I actually enjoyed doing the homework. Particularly the proofs. Now, I was always a science geek. I'd always been getting in trouble by doing experiments with things. But geometry was always fascinating. Taking a couple of abstract ideas, and then using them to PROVE something else that was equally abstract. There are a few things in geometry that are simply ASSUMED to be true. Like two parallel lines won't ever touch. Or any two points can make a line. The two-points-make-a-line idea is pretty useful. It's the one thing that was necessary to figure out how to fix longitude. Latitude is easy, as it's based on the stars. But longitude requires being able to accurately measure time. And something called "dead reckoning." Which means you have to look behind you and know EXACTLY where you were a certain time period before. That way you'll have two points, and the time. This way you can calculate EXACTLY where you are. AND exactly where you'll be in a certain time, so long as you stay on course. This is also helpful in personal development. Imagine, for example, if you just started jogging one year ago. And one year ago, you could barely walk half a mile. Now you can run five without stopping. And you know reasonably well how fast you can run five miles. You can use the same basic concept. Look back into your past one year. And see where you WERE to where you ARE. This can give you a reasonable expectation of where you'll BE. The FURTHER back you can look into your past, the FURTHER you'll be able to look into your future. The trouble comes when you don't have much between a year ago and now. If a year ago you spent most of your time watching TV and wishing something would change, and TODAY you spend most of your time watching TV and wishing something would change, well.... As soon as you start SOMETHING different, something WILL change. And do something a little DIFFERENT each day, you'll build flexibility. The more things you can look back on, the more flexible you're future will be. So everything you do TODAY will slowly drift into your past. And so long as you do something DIFFERENT each day, you'll be simultaneously building your past as well as your future. So, what will YOU do differently today? Get Started: http://mindpersuasion.com/long-game/
  14. One of the most coveted interpersonal "feelings" is one of outcome independence. Meaning you are totally relaxed in the moment. The less you seem concerned about the outcome, the more likely you'll get a positive outcome. For example, let's consider two sales people. One is VERY HIGHLY dependent on the outcome. This guy would be extremely worried about NOT making the sale. Which would make him very aggressive trying to make the sale. He would come across as pushy and wouldn't take no for an answer. He might even get angry if customers didn't buy. On the other hand, consider a guy who didn't mind if he made a sale or not. Why would he not care? Perhaps he was truly concerned with customer satisfaction. He only wanted to sell if the customer wanted to buy. Or maybe he would get paid no matter what. One strong reason to be outcome independent is understanding the numbers. Even if somebody gets paid pure commission, the longer view they take, the easier this will be. If they KNOW, based on experience, that one out of ten will buy something, they can simply relax. Instead of seeing every customer and thinking, "I hope they buy!" they'll instead see each customer and think, "Hmm, I wonder if they'll buy." Talking to a customer from the second frame of mind would be much more relaxing. Both from the customer's and the salesperson's standpoint. The LONGER your view, the more you can see each individual interaction as a TINY part in the whole. The SHORTER your view, the more anxious you'll be. The more each and every conversation will feel like it's do or die. There are many ways to cultivate this long view. One is to have a lot of experience. Another is to practice seeing EACH interaction as a learning opportunity. This starts by looking at each interaction AFTER it happens. And using it as a source of improvement. The more you do this, the easier it gets. Pretty soon you'll develop a real time "outcome independent" feeling. Another way to look at it is where you put your focus. If you ONLY focus on the short term, you'll ONLY see the short term. Success is fantastic. Failure is horrible. But the LONGER your view, the less each interaction means. Pretty soon, no matter WHAT happens in the short term, it will FEEL like success. This will significantly increase your confidence, and your chances of success. Learn How: http://mindpersuasion.com/long-game/
  15. A useful statement is that you can lead a horse to water, but you can't make him drink. A horse is trained to obey the rider. You pull one way, the horse goes that way. You pull the other way, the horse goes the other way. Speed up, slow down, stop, the same structure. Now, why would a horse be in front of water and NOT drink? Obviously, because he's not thirsty. Another way to express this truism is you can kind of manipulate people's actions, but you can't really manipulate their internal desires. Supermarkets and those who engineer them have been trying for years. They set up the store so we, the customers, are led wherever they want us to go. And their entire angle is to try to create buying desire. Colorful packages, enticing smells, sexy people, TV branding, etc. These are all designed to lead US to PRODUCTS and make us BUY. If you put a horse in front of water, he'll only drink if he's thirsty. Put a human in front of a bunch of products that we really don't need, and it turns out you CAN make us buy. But that only goes so far. This is only possible with a HUGE combination of VERY EXPENSIVE elements. TV advertising, lots of research and development. Training us to go to the same supermarket over and over. For individuals, it seems we're stuck with the horse model. For example, you COULD get a girl to come to your place, but this is NOT going to automatically make her want to jump your bones. You COULD convince a potential customer to let you in their house so you can give them a twenty minute product pitch. But it WON'T automatically make them desperate to buy. However, both of these are locked into the horse model. The rider of the horse gives the horse EXTERNAL stimulus that changes the horses EXTERNAL behavior. It does nothing for the horses INTERNAL desires. When you get a girl to your place, or your demo in front of a customer, it's essentially the same thing. A bunch of EXTERNAL IDEAS to move their behavior. But just like the non-thirsty horse, it won't do much for their desires. Luckily, there is a much easier way. It's based on absolutely DITCHING the idea of giving them a bunch of external ideas. And instead, carefully and slowly pulling their desires from the inside out. And making them bigger and bigger and bigger. So big they will naturally go after their desires. And with a little bit of practice, you can carefully build their desires so they'll go WHEREVER you want. And DO whatever you want. Learn How: http://mindpersuasion.com/deep-mind-persuasion/
  16. If you can talk a good game, you can go pretty far. Stand up comics make tons of money by telling stories. If you learn the basic structure of humor, and learn how to tell a string of essentially basic stories, you can make a lot money. Of course, learning how to do this takes a lot time. Most people simply cannot speak very articulately. Even the "man on the street" TV interviews are rehearsed. People often misunderstand to be some kind of "fake news conspiracy." But in reality, the reporters ask the guy or gal some questions, and they practice answering those questions over and over. Until they can say a fairly articulate and well thought out answer. A pretty simple rule of thumb is that ANYTHING you see, either on TV, or YouTube, is either practiced, or edited. Even those goofy videos where they do pick up examples, magic tricks, or just simple questions to show how "dumb" people are, are heavily edited. They may interact with 20-30 people in a day and then show the 4-5 that look the BEST. The bottom line is if you walk up to ANYBODY, and expect them to be able to speak cleverly or articulately, you will be disappointed. This is why walking up and trying to IMPRESS somebody often backfires. You walk up, say something clever and witty (and rehearsed). And they feel very much on the spot. And if they can't respond in kind, it won't be very enjoyable for them. On the other hand, if instead of trying to impress people with your awesome wit and cleverness, instead make it as EASY as possible on them. Ask simple questions that are EASY to answer. The first few should ONLY serve to CREATE an interaction. Once rapport is established, then start to ask questions about them. Forget about talking about how awesome you are. Instead, ask them questions that simply by answering will make them feel good about themselves. No need to talk about yourself at all. Which means ANYBODY can do this. Bling, looks, game, charisma, none of that will matter. And if you READ their answers, they'll subconsciously tell you EXACTLY the follow up questions you should ask. So you can keep asking them questions they will ENJOY answering. Soon they'll be subconsciously associating all those good feelings with you. Which will make them VERY interested in you. Learn How: http://mindpersuasion.com/deep-mind-persuasion/
  17. A very popular and useful book is "Psycho Cybernetics." It's one of those old school type books. Based not on metaphysical theories, but real data. It was written by a doctor. A plastic surgeon. Not the kind that builds fake boobs or younger faces. But the kind that fixes people's appearance after accidents. And he found something very interesting. He found ZERO correlation between somebody's appearance and their self image. Some people had HUGE self confidence, self image, etc., while having not so stellar looks. On the other hand, people who had FANTASTIC looks sometimes had the worst image of themselves. Of course, sometimes it was the opposite. This is what they mean when they say ZERO correlation. Just by looking at how gorgeous (or not gorgeous) somebody is, you have ZERO idea how they feel about themselves. And since Maltz (the author) was a trained medical doctor and not a metaphysician, he decided to figure out the reason. And the result was his book, Psycho Cybernetics. One of the things he found about people who have HIGH self image was that they NEVER compared themselves to others. On the other hand, people with self image troubles were ALWAYS comparing themselves to others. The only people we SHOULD compare ourselves to is how we USED to be. Because no matter HOW awesome we are, there will ALWAYS be somebody better. So comparing yourself to others will RARELY end well. Unfortunately, this is the EXACT same strategy most people use when trying to make a positive impression on others. They talk ABOUT themselves. They talk ABOUT their opinions (which they think are very clever). They talk ABOUT their dreams and accomplishments, which they believe to be better. The problem is that as soon as you operate from this mindset, you are making it very EASY for the other person to REJECT you. Because all they need to do is think of somebody who is BETTER. Of course, this strategy MAY have worked twenty or thirty years ago. Because the only people they could have compared you to were the people they actually met. But if you tried this SAME strategy on somebody with a healthy social media following? Forget it! Our modern Frankenstein social media environment makes it easy for ANYBODY to pretend they are famous. Which means trying to IMPRESS them is very, very difficult. Luckily, there is a much better way. A much easier way. One that REQUIRES face to face conversation. So no matter HOW many billions of followers they have, nobody can touch you. Learn How: http://mindpersuasion.com/deep-mind-persuasion/
  18. Everybody loves deep conversations. The kind that make you really think. The kind that stand out in your mind and your memory. Everybody would like to make an impression on others. Most do so by trying to be IMPRESSIVE. Grammatically, this makes perfect sense. You want to make an impression, so you act and speak impressively. The idea being that when the conversation is over, they'll remember you. And they'll remember you by thinking, "Wow, that guy was really IMPRESSIVE." How would you do this? Be very clever. Have a lot of interesting stories and anecdotes. Be extremely witty and humorous. Have an extremely strong frame so when they try and poke holes in it, you can easily out frame them. This is all very possible. And it is THE most common strategy. Unfortunately, while it can work like magic, it takes a LOT of practice. It's all based on YOU. And how they JUDGE you. No matter how strong of a "game" you build, you are always presenting yourself to them for approval. Because this is common, you are essentially COMPETING with everybody else who has this same strategy. So when you try to IMPRESS somebody, they are comparing you to everybody else who has tried to IMPRESS them. If you happen to BE a very impressive person, this is pretty easy. Unfortunately most of us are pretty normal. Lucky for us, there is a MUCH EASIER way. A way to leave a much BETTER impression that has NOTHING to do with you. Nothing to do with your job, your bling, your social status, or even your physical appearance. And EVERYTHING to do with how you make them FEEL. How do you do this? By focusing on STRUCTURE instead of content. Content is all the THINGS you try to impress them with. Structure is HOW they think. HOW they see the world. It's one thing to ask about them from a content level. This is essentially Dale Carnegie's advice. Talk about them instead of you. Since they are more attracted to ideas about THEM than they are about you. But when you ask about them from a structure level, it will seem incredibly deep and memorable. You'll ask them simple questions that get them thinking in ways they've NEVER done before. And because you'll be covertly eliciting their deep FILTERS, you will know MORE about them in just a few minutes than their best friends. And when you demonstrate this, they'll be more impressed with you than anybody they've ever met. Learn How: http://mindpersuasion.com/deep-mind-persuasion/
  19. There are two specific thoughts that create social anxiety. The first is not knowing what to say. You see a cute guy or girl across the room. You share a few IOI's. But then you wonder, "what should I say?" There is a belief among many that you need to IMPRESS the other person with your conversation skills. This idea presupposes that THEY have the ability to accept or reject you. Which more deeply presupposes that YOU have already ACCEPTED them. This puts you behind before you even get started. And to a greater extent, we have this "default" mindset when we present ourselves to ANYBODY and hope to be ACCEPTED. One way this comes across is in job interviews. The idea is the interviewer has all the power. And the interviewee has to make themselves sound BETTER than everybody else. This is not the best strategy. This is what happens when we operate from SCARCITY. When we think that ONE PERSON is our only hope for happiness. That if that ONE PERSON reject us, we are doomed. If you need a job, or if you haven't been with anybody in a while, it is very hard to shake this mindset. But unless you DO manage to shake it, the scarcity mindset will continue to haunt you. Unfortunately, it's not something that can be switched off. It's kind of like a bad habit. You need to re-train yourself. Luckily, you can do this with friends and colleagues. By practicing a STRUCTURAL way to talk to people. There are seven basic STRUCTURAL filters that we use to help make sense of all the data hitting our senses. Because these filters operate subconsciously, few people know about them. But once you understand how these work, and how to talk about them, a couple of VERY IMPORTANT things will happen. One is you'll NEVER worry about wondering what to say. Once you understand these seven basic structures, they can be the source of ENDLESS conversational topics. With very little thinking required. The second thing is people will LOVE talking about these things. They are very DEEP. They are questions that will automatically create a deep connection. Never again will you feel the need to IMPRESS anybody. Because everybody has treasure. And once you learn how EASY it is to go treasure hunting in ANYBODY's brain, you'll soon be the center of attention in ANY social situation. Learn How: http://mindpersuasion.com/deep-mind-persuasion/
  20. Most normal adults are terrified of public speaking. Most are MORE afraid of public speaking than death. Most normal people also have a certain amount of approach anxiety. Sure, a lot of folks won't admit it. But ANYBODY that is normal will be at least a little nervous when they approach somebody they don't know. ESPECIALLY if this person has something. It could be a hiring manager at a networking event. It could be a famous movie star who's autograph you want. It could be a potential customer. It could be a potential romantic interest. But it is absolutely NORMAL to feel nervous when doing this. And there are two perfectly reasonable reasons for this. One is that every single human has a very rude awakening around 2 or 3 years old. That is we LEARN that expressing ourselves is dangerous. This isn't done to us on purpose. But we all have TONS of memories, hard wired in BEFORE we really became conscious, of this two step process. The first step is we have a need, so we express it. The next step is an angry adult shows up and tells us to be quiet. Since this has happened HUNDREDS of times to any normal human, we develop belief. That expressing a desire EQUALS somebody getting angry. That's the first reason. The second reason is much deeper. Genetic. Evolutionary. And that is for the HUGE majority of human history, we ONLY hung around people we knew. Only in the last few seconds of our existence on this planet has the opportunity to approach strangers ALONE been open to us. Our social instincts are NOT calibrated to deal with one-on-one interactions with strangers. This is why anything like approach anxiety is pretty much built into our system. It's also why it's so hard to get rid of. But there IS a workaround. The anxiety is strongest when we feel we are presenting OUR desires to another person. When we feel like we are asking FOR something FROM them. When it is reasonable and logical for them to say NO. Just like that deep cause effect. We ask and the adults say no. So anything that FEELS like that is going to bring up those deep beliefs. The answer is to NOT ask. At least not ask FOR something. Nearly all social anxiety involves the thought of ASKING for something and getting rejected. So stop asking FOR something. Instead, ask ABOUT something. Turn OFF your own ideas and beliefs and requests. And BECOME INTERESTED in the other person. Turns out there is very easy way to ask them a bunch of easy to answer questions. Questions that they will ENJOY answering. Since they are about THEM. And the more they answer, the better they'll feel. And they will associate that good feeling with you. And since those good feelings will be coming from inside THEM, there is no possibility of rejection. Learn How: http://mindpersuasion.com/deep-mind-persuasion/
  21. I've had a lot of sales jobs. Every one of them involved memorizing a pitch. Either a loose structure, or a word by word pitch. Selling cars, for example, involves a ten step process. And just like a sales letter, the whole point of each step is to get to the next step. It took me a while to figure out exactly WHY sales companies do this. It's the same theory as selling itself, or even talking to girls or guys to get numbers. It's all based on percentages. If you are selling vacuum cleaners door to door, then it's just a matter of knocking on enough doors. Once you have your pitch down, and you've got your numbers figured out, it's pretty mechanical. Knock on 30 doors to sell one vacuum cleaner. If that one vacuum cleaner makes you $100 in commissions, that comes out to $3.33 per door. Same with cold calls. Once you figure out the numbers, it's mechanical. But this is EXACTLY how sales companies see salespeople they hire. Pure numbers. If you see a neighborhood with 300 doors, that means ten sales. Any company KNOWS that they are locked into the Pareto principle. Otherwise known as the 80/20 rule. They know that 20% of their sales staff will sell 80% of the stuff. How do they know which is which? That's the thing. They don't need to know. Nor do they need to care. For every ten people they hire, they figure two will be decent. The other eight? They treat those JUST LIKE the vacuum cleaner sellers treats the folks who DON'T buy. Everything CAN be seen through this numbers game. Talk to enough people, and you'll eventually figure out your own numbers. How many calls you need to make before you make a sale. How many girls you need to approach before you get a number. How many job interviews you go on before you get an offer. But this ASSUMES that each one of those (girls, calls, jobs, etc.) is seeing the SAME YOU. The same you shows up and gives the same pitch. This is easy, once you memorize your pitch. But it's very time consuming. And worst of all, you've got to face a TON of rejection. Luckily, there is a much EASIER way. One that doesn't involve ANY rejection. What IS rejection? You make an offer, and they say, "No thanks." Your "offer" (whatever it is) is REJECTED. This other method doesn't involve making ANY OFFER. Instead, it is only about asking questions. Question about them. Questions that are EASY to answer. Questions that make then FEEL GOOD about themselves. The more of these easy questions you ask, the better they'll feel. And pretty soon they'll start to subconsciously associate those good feelings with YOU. And they'll be the ones making YOU and offer. And pleading with you to accept it. Learn How: http://mindpersuasion.com/deep-mind-persuasion/
  22. Baseball has been played a long time. Since the late 1800's. Today's teams play over 160 games per year. That's a lot of games since the late 1800's. 140 years, and over 210,000 games. How many perfect game have their been? 23. You likely don't remember this (I know I don't) but when you were learning to walk, you made a LOT of mistakes. Kids need to fall down quite a bit before they learn to balance on two legs. ALL learning is like this. Even something boring like learning history. You read something, and try to remember it, and you can't. You might call this a "remembering mistake." And you keep practicing until the "remembering mistakes" are low enough. Very few people go through school and get perfect scores on every single test. The human mind-body system is NOT designed to be "perfect." Ever. It's common to make a huge public mistake, and feel terrible. Then somebody says something like: "Oh, don't worry! Everybody makes mistakes sometimes!" This is a HUGE understatement. The TRUTH is that mistakes are part of daily live. They are NECESSARY. Every time you fumble for a light switch in the dark, you are using the human success system. Trial and error until you get CLOSE ENOUGH. Every attempt to find the switch is trial. And when you get CLOSE enough, meaning PART of your finger hits PART of the switch, you're good. This is the story of EVERY human success. Ever. Trial and error until you are close enough. Close enough for what? Whatever it is to achieve the MINIMUM ACCEPTABLE OUTCOME. Who determines that? Sometimes it's you. Sometimes it's your boss. Sometimes it's your coach, or teacher, or spouse, or even your kids. Every action is part of this trial and error until good enough system. Even walking. One area where it's hard to see this is in communication. It's very easy to think in terms of needing perfection. It's very common to end a conversation (or any other communication like a speech) and wish you did better. But this is the BIGGEST source of improvement. To have the idea of SOMETHING you COULD HAVE DONE, but didn't. So long you are pointing your skills in the right direction, you will keep getting better. The "trial and error until good enough" is built into your brain. Deeply and subconsciously. So long as you have a basic framework to work within, and you have ANY kind of experience, you can do better next time. You need to do the acting and reviewing yourself. But you can learn a fantastic communication framework here: http://mindpersuasion.com/verbal-assassin/
  23. Some things you can learn relatively quickly. These are things with more of a binary level of skill. You can either do them, or you can't. These are things like driving, tying your shoes, making a sandwich, etc. Some skills have no upper limit. For most of us, learning how to cook is a binary thing. Once you learn how, you stop worrying about it. Sure, you might pick up a few new skills, learn a few new recipes, but for most of us, once you learn to cook, we don't normally think of practicing our cooking skills on the weekend. If you were a master chef, on the other hand, you would. Or if cooking was a hobby, you would be always wanting to learn more. Some skills are like this. Kind of in the middle. You COULD learn more if you wanted to. But for most of us, once we learn a basic level, we're good. Most of us aren't professional racecar drivers, so we figure once we learn to drive, we think of DOING rather than improving. Some skills are either hobbies or professional skills. You could take up painting as a hobby, continue to learn the rest of your life, and never really consider yourself a professional artist. But there are other skills that are more like META skills. The better you get at these, the better you will do everywhere else. For example, being able to manage your finances effectively is a meta skill. Part of having a robust set of financial skills is understanding various investments. Even if you NEVER considered managing other people's money, you could spend a couple hours a week learning about investments and never run out stuff to learn. It's pretty clear that doing this would benefit you. Another skill that most don't even THINK of as a skill is speaking. Speaking is one of those things we don't even think about. We just figure out how to do it. Rarely do we take time to think about what we are going to say. Giving a speech, asking for a raise, asking out girl, etc. These are considered RARE events in our lives. Most of the time, we have some random thoughts and try and use poorly chosen words to describe them. But once you start to PRACTICE your speaking skills, you'll also be practicing something else. Your thinking skills. You can't really practice speaking without practicing thinking. And if you make a point to practice THESE two things, you'll gain IMMENSE power in nearly every area of your life. Unless you plan on becoming a professional mime, or any kind behind the scenes job, how you SPEAK will be an indication of how you THINK. Do both of those well, and you can build any life you want. Learn How: http://mindpersuasion.com/verbal-assassin/
  24. There is one powerful technique that can significantly bolster your frame. This is very easy and requires zero thinking. But it's something that many people are uncomfortable doing. Yet at the same time, you'll find this one technique is something VERY powerful speakers can do. And that is to PAUSE while speaking. A common reason for exhibiting a less than strong frame is being nervous. And when we are nervous, we tend to speak quickly and swallow some of our words. We don't like social attention, so we want to get rid of it as quickly as possible. For example, if you are at a meeting at work, and you get unexpectedly called on, it's not usually a very enjoyable feeling. In situations like this, we tend to answer the question as quickly as possible, and get the attention off us. Unfortunately, this radiates a kind of frame-weakness. When people intend to harm us emotionally, this makes us an easy target for the office bully. They KNOW they can easily say something we won't know how to respond to. This is the main reason for the insult. To put us off balance, so we stand there looking like an idiot. Developing the ability to PAUSE while speaking will eliminate this. It will do so by building our frame energy. But it will also make you a much more competent speaker. It will give you the brain space to carefully choose your words and sentences. Being able to see and choose the BEST ideas is a natural outcome of building up your "pause strength." It's easy to start, and easy to practice. Practice it like any other skill. Start slowly, and build slowly. The easiest way is to put a pause in the middle of a simple sentence. The other day I saw (pause) a squirrel. At first this may seem to PULL attention toward you. And that may be uncomfortable. But pretty soon, it will feel pretty good. Once you get used to that, you can play around with it. Put pauses in different places. In between sentences. Once you develop the ability to sit or stand and THINK instead of talk, WHILE people are looking at you, this will give you a LOT of power. You'll learn to speak more slowly, more eloquently and more persuasively. Speaking slowly and choosing your words is one sign of having powerful charisma. People notice it on a subconscious level. The second benefit is carefully choosing your words. And once you learning some advanced linguistic techniques, those words you choose can be DEADLY. If you want them to. Learn How: http://mindpersuasion.com/verbal-assassin/
  25. One of the hardest things to accept is the idea of ever present human hierarchies. A lot of us believe, and a lot of people WANT us to believe, that everybody can be equal. But in reality, we are primates. We've been living together as primates for a couple million years. We've only been "human," capable of language for about 100,000 years. We've only had large societies for about 5,000 years. We've only had post industrial societies (electricity, cheap travel, etc.) for a couple hundred years. Internet, email, text, etc. for a couple decades. From an instinctive level, we are very much still driven by tribal programming. This is just as powerful as hunger. It's very hard to lose weight ONLY using willpower. This is a clear case of conscious intention vs. deep instincts. Social hierarchies are the same. Often, this is very helpful. When you are hanging out with your friends and playfully insulting each other. Or having "contests" to see who can come up with the cleverest, and funniest way to make fun of your idiot boss. Even if you are meeting somebody new, being playfully and funny is a GREAT WAY to demonstrate confidence. In movies, the "alpha" male tends to show his "dominance" by playfully teasing the girl he's with. These are all very healthy, very enjoyable, and very NORMAL ways to demonstrate hierarchical "dominance." More so in straight up competitions. Kids learn in school to have debate contests. To use advanced thinking and logic to demonstrate hierarchical dominance. Two people in a meeting are using their ideas to try and demonstrate hierarchical dominance. So long as the strongest idea that wins is going to help EVERYBODY at the company, it's all good. This goes wrong when people try underhanded ways to demonstrate hierarchical dominance. Teachers tell kids, that they shouldn't let people "push them around." Parents tell kids they need to "stand up for themselves." How, exactly do you do this? How do you respond to the office bully when his insults are so subtle you aren't even sure that they ARE insults? The first step is to understand that most communication is NON-VERBAL. This means that most communication is subconscious to subconscious. The words aren't really that important. It's very much like being physically pushed on the playground. The playground bully's whole angle is he pushes you, and you DON'T push back. This is a clear signal to EVERYBODY else that he is SUPERIOR to on the social hierarchy. The office bully (or any other verbal bully) has the SAME angle. To push you, so you don't push back. And demonstrate to EVERYBODY who's the "man." Luckily, there are TONS of ways you can "push back." All of which are easy, and safe, and won't require any "bully energy" on your part. Easy for you, and devastating for them. Learn How: http://mindpersuasion.com/verbal-assassin/
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